When a Con goes Wrong
by Pokeyshadow
Summary: Peter gets shot and Neal blames himself. It's not about what happened but how they move on.
1. Chapter 1

Peter moaned and Elizabeth put down the magazine she was absent mindedly flipping through. She quickly stood and leaned over her husband, gently stroking the side of his face.

"Peter?" His head turned towards her voice and Elizabeth, despite the past two days, allowed her hope to soar. "Peter, can you hear me?" His eyes remained closed but he wasn't grimacing and moaning as he had the last three times, when it was apparent the pain was too much and he was sedated back into oblivion. Elizabeth knew she should get a nurse but she couldn't bear to leave her husband's side. It had been two days since Peter had been shot twice and nearly died and all she knew was it was a case gone bad and Neal was under house arrest until Peter was awake and could verify what happened. She had tried to call Neal but he wasn't answering his phone and neither Clinton nor Diana would explain what Neal had done. Peter's eyes flickered as he fought to the surface and finally they opened, much to the relief of his wife.

"Peter." Elizabeth's eyes welled with tears and she wiped them away as she continued to caress Peter's face. He stared up at her, confused with unfocussed eyes. "El?" His voice was a hoarse whisper but it was music to Elizabeth's ears. He flailed his arm upward and she took a hold of his hand, squeezing gently.

"You're going to be fine" she assured him. Peter glanced around, and then back at his wife. "What…?" He shut his eyes, face contorted with pain.

"I'm getting the nurse" Elizabeth said as she shot out of the small, hospital room. She returned shortly with back up and stood in the background as they accessed her husband's condition. Her anxiety eased up when the doctor ordered morphine for the pain but didn't mention sedating him. A few minutes later, the drug was given and the room cleared. Elizabeth once again sat at her husband's side, holding his hand until the drug took effect and his pain eased immensely.

Peter licked his dry lips and almost immediately a straw was placed in his mouth. He gulped down some water and smiled weakly. "Thanks hon." He glanced up and down his body, focusing on the tubes in his arms and the huge bandages wrapped around his immobile right leg.

"What happened?" He saw a flicker of concern cross his wife's face and he turned his head, his mind trying to put the pieces of the past together. They were working a simple embezzlement case and Neal had double crossed him. Peter shook that thought out of his mind as he remembered the younger man coming to see him, confessing that he had tried to help a friend in the process of getting their man and the friend had double crossed Neal. Peter had been angry, had threatened to send Neal back to jail before calming down…they had worked all night to figure out how to use this to their advantage. But in the end, they had both walked into a set up. Peter had noticed the sniper first and managed to push Neal out of the way before the bullets hit and his mind went dark.

"Peter, can you remember?"

"A little" he admitted.

"What did Neal do?"

"Nothing" Peter lied, knowing it was best to keep this from his wife. "I need to see Neal."

"You can't." Elizabeth shrugged. "Reese made it quite clear Neal wasn't allowed to go anywhere until he talked to you."

"Then tell Hughes I want to talk to him." Peter bellowed before grabbing his side, in pain.

"Honey, take it easy." Elizabeth ran a soothing hand over his chest. "You are in no shape to talk to anyone at the moment. Neal is fine. You, on the other hand, nearly died. Do you even want to know the damage that was done to you?"

Peter shrugged. "Do I want to know?" he countered, again eyeing his right leg.

"Your kneecap was shattered" Elizabeth stated calmly, "but in time, you should get back full use of your leg." Elizabeth looked away and Peter sensed that wasn't the worse of it.

"What else El?"

"The other bullet entered your side and caused a lot of internal bleeding and they had to remove your spleen." Elizabeth's voice cracked slightly. "We just have to watch your heath better…but you'll be fine."

Peter reached up and cupped his wife's chin. "Are you trying to convince me or yourself?" Elizabeth pulled away angrily. "Peter, you almost died. Of course I'm upset and I'm worried and I don't know how I'm going to work and be here with you and the dog…" She paused, taking a deep breath. "I'm going to take Satch to my sister's, he'll be better there."

"Elizabeth." Peter reached over and grabbed his wife's hand. "You are not sending the dog away and you are not quitting your job. We'll figure this out ok?" She nodded hesitantly. "Peter you need to rest so you can get your strength back."

"OK." Peter was tired and he hurt, but he didn't want to admit it. "Ok, I will rest but when I wake up, I will call Hughes and ask him to come here." Elizabeth nodded before sitting down in the chair beside the bed, watching her husband.

Sleep did not come easily for Peter. Even with the pain and the drugs in his system, he was worried about Neal and what this was doing to him. This was Neal's fault and he knew it and he was sure Neal was blaming himself. All this time alone was probably eating away at his friend and Peter feared what he might do. Before Peter fell asleep, he had a plan and he hoped Hughes would go along with it.

Two days past before Peter felt well enough to make that phone call and it was late in the evening when Hughes finally showed up. "You're looking better" Hughes said as he entered the room. "How do you feel?"

"OK" Peter answered without much conviction. "About Neal…" Peter paused when his boss held his hand up.

"Peter, before you defend him, he's asking to go back to jail and I have to say I agree with him."

"No!" Peter knew that was the last place Neal wanted to be and he was letting the guilt get to him.

"It wasn't just his fault."

"I know" Hughes said abruptly. "And that's the only reason he's not in jail right now. Peter, what were you thinking? When Neal came to you, the whole operation should have been disbanded. I expect this from Neal, not from you."

Peter looked away. "Hindsight is twenty- twenty" he mumbled feeling both chastised and embarrassed by his boss's words. "I got arrogant" Peter admitted as he turned and faced Hughes. "Neal and I have made such a good team I didn't think anyone could con us. I screwed up."

"And where did that get you?" Hughes asked, not ready to let up on the subject. "Peter you are too smart and I expect more from you. Now give me one good reason why I'm not sending Neal back to jail."

"Because he's too good to sit and rot in jail" Peter quietly said. "Because he's my friend and I let him down" Peter added, eyeing his boss. "Reese, he never stays long enough to face the consequences of his actions. He pulls a con and takes off. It can be different this time."

"I'm not sure I understand" Hughes said. "What is your plan?"

"I want him around me" Peter began, smiling weakly. "I know how long it's going to take to get back on my feet and he won't see me struggling from jail."

Hughes chuckled. "You want to make him your nurse?"

Peter laughed, causing him to clutch his stomach in pain. "Don't…" Peter bit on his lower lip until the laughter and pain subsided.

"No. I want him to work with my team and help me when needed. Elizabeth is worried about feeding the dog, staying with me, working and I figure Neal could help after work."

Hughes mulled that over. "And if he says no?"

"He won't" Peter assured him. "The last place he wants to be is jail and we both know that. Let me talk to him and I'll convince him."

"I don't know." Hughes crossed his arms. "Can Jones handle him? Peter, one mistake and I will send him back and there's nothing you can do about it."

"I give you my word. He won't screw up."

Hughes sighed, unconvinced. "I'll have Jones bring him here tomorrow. You need to make sure he understands."

"I know. Wait!" Peter called out before his boss could leave. "Tell Jones Neal will have to get a valid driver's license and a bureau car."

"What? Peter, are you out of your mind?" Hughes rubbed his eyes wearily.

"The radius on his anklet will have to be readjusted to include the hospital and my house" Peter yelled as Hughes threw his arms up in disgust, leaving before Peter could add anything else.

Peter settled back against his pillows, rubbing his aching side. He wondered if he was putting too much trust in his friendship with Neal. No! Something good had to come out of this and he would make sure of that.


	2. Chapter 2

Neal sat in the dark, with a cold cup of coffee on the table beside him, as he watched the sun slowly rise before him. He had barely slept since that day and the few minutes he had fallen into a fretful unconsciousness were marred with nightmares of Peter covered with blood. It should never have happened. One minute they were walking towards the meeting place, the next Peter had pushed him to the ground. He didn't see the sniper but he would never forget the sounds Peter made as the bullets entered him or the sight of Peter lying there motionless as the pool of blood grew larger. His first instinct was to stop the bleeding but that proved fruitless so he could only hold his partner in his arms as others ran towards them and help finally arrived. He had wanted to go to the hospital but Jones had stopped him or any of them from going…Hughes had heard what happened and wanted them back at the bureau immediately.

During the briefing Neal had told the truth and Jones had backed him up. They all knew what Neal had done but Peter had made the call to keep the scam up and try to get their man to confess, knowing that Neal had brought another person into the fray and that person was now out to get Neal.

"It should have been me" Neal whispered as he took a sip of coffee. It would have been if Peter hadn't shoved him out of the way. He had cornered Hughes after the briefing and asked to go back to jail and Hughes looked more than ready to send him but something had stopped him. Instead he put him under house arrest until Hughes could talk to Peter.

Peter was better, Neal knew that. Even though he refused to answer his phone or let Mozzie in, somehow Mozzie was getting details of Peter's condition and texting him. His stomach rumbled, reminding Neal of something else he had done very little of since the shooting. Neal closed his eyes as the sun grew brighter, wondering if this would be the day his fate was decided.

Neal startled out of a deep sleep and then he realized why.

"Caffrey, I know you're in there. Open up." It was Jones banging on the door. Neal stood, stumbling in the process. Weak and tired, he staggered to the door and opened it.

"Shit Caffrey, you haven't changed in five days." Neal looked downward at the blood stained shirt he was still wearing and then back at Jones, shrugging. "It didn't seem important" he quietly said, holding on to the door for support.

"Peter wants to see you, think you can manage to take a shower?" Neal didn't answer but he walked towards the bedroom and grabbed some clean clothes before entering the bathroom. Once the water was running Jones took out his cell phone and dialed the hospital.

Peter was worried and he was in pain and he wasn't sure which was making him angrier. He wasn't a good patient as his wife had reminded him several times in the past day but he should be feeling better and he wasn't. And Neal…he knew the younger man would be taking this hard but what Jones told him…Peter couldn't imagine him wearing a blood stained shirt for so long.

"Elizabeth!" Peter bellowed, clutching his side in agony, wondering how long it took to find a nurse in this damn place. He was doubled over when she returned.

"Peter!" Her first instinct was to run to his side but she managed to stay back and allow the nurse to do her job.

"His blood pressure is too low" the nurse said as she ran past Elizabeth and called for a doctor. Several minutes later Elizabeth was on the outside holding her breath as a team of doctors worked on her husband.

"Elizabeth." She turned as Jones and Neal neared her.

"What's going on?" Jones asked, his eyes focused on the commotion in Peter's room.

"I don't know" Elizabeth said, through tears. "He was in pain and it just kept getting worse." She looked past Jones, at Neal, leaning heavily against the wall. He glanced at her briefly but it was long enough to see how worried he was and something else. "Neal." Elizabeth reached up and gently cupped his chin, turning his face towards her. It was fear she saw. She knew the ex con had formed a special bond with her husband, though neither man would ever admit it.

"He's going to be fine" she whispered, wiping away the lone tear that streamed down his face. Neal closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the wall, willing himself to stay upright. He straightened as the doctor exited the room and neared Elizabeth.

"We think he's bleeding internally. We need to go back in there, the sooner the better. They're prepping him now."

Elizabeth gasped and moments later they wheeled a sedated Peter out of the room.

Two hours later, the surgery was considered a success and Peter was in recovery. Neal had fallen asleep, curled up awkwardly in a chair, holding Elizabeth's hand tightly.

"Clinton, what happened that day? Is Neal the reason Peter got shot?" Jones straightened, processing his thoughts before he answered.

"No, not really" he said, glancing at Neal. "He did something stupid but it was Peter's call to continue with the con."

"So it was Peter's fault?" Elizabeth asked curtly. Jones shook his head, unwilling to put total blame on either man.

"We take calculated risks" Jones explained evenly. "This time we lost. Elizabeth, they're partners. As unconventional as it is, they've learned to watch each other's back. And when your partner gets shot…" Jones sighed, as Neal mumbled something.

"We go through training for this, Neal hasn't."

"And so close to Kate's death" Elizabeth stated quietly.

"Yeah." Jones fidgeted in the uncomfortable chair, glancing at his watch. "I'm going to grab something to eat, do you want anything?"

Elizabeth shook her head no, her stomach was still in knots and she knew food was the last thing she could tolerate. "Bring something back for Neal, ok?"

Jones nodded as he headed down the hallway, leaving Elizabeth alone with the sleeping ex con and her thoughts.


	3. Chapter 3

"Hey you" Elizabeth said, as she smiled down at her husband. "We really have to stop meeting this way." Peter managed a weak smile, feeling as if he had just awoken from a deep sleep. He reached for his side but Elizabeth grabbed his hand.

"No touching." Her continued smile belied the deep circles etched underneath her eyes. "You were still bleeding and that's why the pain was getting worse. But they think the stitches will hold now and you should feel better in a day or two." Peter closed his eyes, trying to digest the new complication. He wanted out and he knew they wouldn't let him on his feet until his side healed.

"How much longer?" he mumbled, running a hand through his now greasy hair. "Can someone please wash my hair?" Elizabeth sighed as she ran a comforting hand across Peter's chest. "We'll take care of the hair tomorrow, I promise. Peter, I know how hard this is but laying here in bed is the best thing for you. Your side has to heal before they'll let you move around on crutches." They heard a noise and Peter looked beyond Elizabeth and noticed Neal, sleeping on the recliner, tossing and turning in the middle of another nightmare.

"Why is Neal here?" he asked, his gaze still on the younger man.

"You asked Clinton to bring him" Elizabeth answered. "Don't you remember?" She looked down, clearly worried.

"Don't look at me like that" Peter barked. "I just assumed he'd go home…that's it." Taking a deep breath, Elizabeth managed a fake smile.

"Clinton offered but he chose to stay here." Elizabeth paused, glancing over her shoulder. "I was able to get him to eat two meals though he protested the whole time saying he wasn't hungry. I wish he slept better" she added, frowning as Neal's mumblings grew louder. Elizabeth neared him and whispered comforting words as she gently rubbed his head. Soon he grew quiet and she returned to her husband who eyed the scene before him, feeling totally helpless.

"He was saying Kate's name, wasn't he?" Elizabeth nodded yes. "Sometimes he calls for you also, I'm assuming when you got shot. He watched someone he loved die and someone he cares for almost die." Peter turned away from Elizabeth, though he knew her words were true, it was easier at that moment to think of Neal as his charge and not as a friend.

"Peter, what is going to happen to him?"

"What do you mean?" Peter fidgeted in bed, trying to get more comfortable. The pain was back but nothing like it had been and he assumed the medication was wearing off.

"Clinton said he did something stupid but didn't say what."

"He shouldn't have said anything" Peter stated angrily.

"No, you should have" Elizabeth countered, slapping Peter's hand away from the bandage. "If you're in pain, tell me and I'll get the doctor."

"I'm fine. Did he also tell you Neal wants to go back to jail?"

"No" Elizabeth admitted, staring at the sleeping man. "What are you going to do?"

"Talk to him" Peter answered. "There's not much else I can do. If he insists on going back, Hughes is more than willing to oblige him."

"Peter, he doesn't want to go jail and you know it."

Peter nodded. "Guilt does a number on you." He glanced at Neal.

"So does forgiveness."

Peter stared at his wife. "There's nothing to forgive" he quietly said. "It was my call to continue not his." Peter noticed how tired she looked.

"El, go home. Sleep in our bed with the dog and go to work tomorrow." Peter knew she was going to protest but he didn't give her a chance. "I'll be fine and it will give me time to deal with Neal, ok?"

"You'll call me if you need anything?" He nodded. She pointed at Neal. "Take care of him. I think this spooked him more than you realize."

Elizabeth hesitated before grabbing her purse and leaving. Peter watched Neal for a few minutes and convinced Neal was sleeping soundly, he allowed himself to drift off to sleep.

Peter woke up, confused at the noise until he realized it was coming from Neal. He wasn't sure if Neal was laughing or crying but it unnerved him and he called out to his partner. Neal didn't stir so Peter's voice grew louder each time he called his friend's name but all had the same effect, Neal slept on and Peter grew more worried. Finally he had no choice but to summon the night nurse. She walked in and immediately her attention turned to the young man sleeping in the recliner.

"Please wake him" Peter pleaded. "He's having a nightmare and I can't reach him." The young lady nodded and bent over Neal, gently shaking him. Neal jumped out of the chair and tripped over his own feet, landing hard on the floor, shielding himself with his arms.

"Neal!" Peter raised himself up on his elbow as the nurse turned the light on. "Neal, wake up." Slowly the younger man lifted his head, his eyes settling on the figure in bed.

"Peter?"

"Yeah, it's me." Peter smiled as Neal stood and approached him; both glancing sideways as the nurse quickly left the room.

"Don't think she'll be back" Peter said, chuckling. "Neal, are you ok?"

"Asks the man in a hospital bed" Neal countered as he sat down near Peter. "Sorry, I woke you" he whispered, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. "Must have been some nightmare" Peter said, hoping to get more out of Neal. But the younger man just shrugged and stared up at the ceiling, unwilling or unable to elaborate.

"Neal, look at me. Neal!" Any preconceived notions that Peter had about teaching Neal a lesson dissipated the moment the younger man lowered his gaze. He didn't want to go to jail to run away from what happened. Con man or no con man, Peter only had to look in to his eyes and know that Neal was being eaten alive by the guilt he felt and jail was his form of punishment. But it wasn't what Peter wanted.

"Neal, I won't let you go back to jail." Neal opened his mouth to protest. "Don't" Peter ordered, pointing a finger at his partner. "Keep your mouth closed and listen for a change." Neal indignantly closed his mouth but remained silent.

"We are both to blame for what happened so we put it behind us and move on. Neal, I need your help, our team needs you and rotting in jail changes nothing." Peter paused, waiting for Neal to react but the younger man simply lowered his gaze, his eyes boring a hole in the floor.

"Neal?" Peter reached over and lightly touched his partner's arm. "Are we ok?"

"I'm sorry" Neal quietly said. "I never wanted this to happen."

"I know" Peter responded, his hand still resting on Neal's arm. "Do you think you can go back to sleep?" Peter asked as he yawned. Neal shrugged but didn't budge off the chair, content to sit there near Peter, comforted by his friend's closeness and the hand holding his arm.

"Neal, move." Peter removed his hand. "Get the recliner and push it next to the bed." Slowly Neal stood and staggered toward the chair, moving it as Peter had ordered. "I'm tired and you look like hell. We will both benefit by more sleep so sit and go back to sleep."

Neal settled down and Peter reached over and lightly rubbed Neal's head. "Just making sure I can reach you if you have another nightmare" Peter explained. "Now go to sleep." Peter fell asleep almost instantly, his fingers entangled in Neal's hair.


	4. Chapter 4

Neal leaned against the bed and watched Peter sleep. He had no intention of going back to sleep and taking the chance of another nightmare waking them both. He contemplated his life and wondered how it had become so complicated. Ironically, Neal's life was so much simpler when he and Kate were pulling cons and hiding from the cops.

Neal blamed himself. The deal was his idea but it had always been about getting out of prison and finding Kate. But something unexpected had happened. Neal had found a niche, a place to belong and people around him who cared and weren't afraid to show it.

It started with Peter. Neal wasn't sure when the keeper had become the friend but over time it evolved to what it was, two partners and friends who would die for the other. Peter had proven that when he pushed Neal out of the way. With Peter came Elizabeth; a couple in love and Neal wasn't afraid to admit he envied what they had and so badly wanted that with Kate. Then there was June; who knew him so well because of her husband. Add Mozzie to the mix and Neal was… confused. He lowered his forehead to the bed and momentarily closed his eyes.

It had been a long time since Neal had something resembling a family surrounding him and for the most part, he didn't know how to react or behave. He was impulsive and he was used to doing what he wanted when he wanted. Rules were meant to be broken…something Peter would never understand or allow. But this job, his boring pain in the ass paper shuffling job, also gave him the opportunity to use his skills and use them for good. Neal lifted his head and stared at Peter, truly stared for the first time since the shooting.

Not even a week had passed and Peter's appearance was clearly altered, the weight loss especially noticeable. He had tubes hanging from both arms; a drain in his abdomen and the dreaded catheter…Neal could only imagine how humiliating that was. His right knee was swathed and immobile, with his leg hanging a few inches above the bed. For someone as athletic as Peter was, Neal knew it was going to be a long and hard recovery.

He didn't want to go back to jail, he had offered as a punishment and Peter saw right through it. Peter had said he needed him…Neal was used to being needed….to forge a painting or pick a lock, or set up the perfect crime were among the many ways he had been 'needed' in the past.

"Peter, I'm not sure I know how to be a friend" he quietly said, his fingers tracing the bland pattern on the hospital blanket.

"Yes you do." Neal glanced over his shoulder, at Elizabeth, wondering how long she had been standing there. She put a finger to her lips and pointed to the door. Neal quietly stood and followed her out.

"Is one for me?" he asked eyeing the two cups she was holding. Elizabeth nodded, handing one over. "Espresso, just the way you like it."

Neal smiled slightly before taking a sip.

"Also stopped at that little French bakery you like." Elizabeth produced a small bag from her purse. "Let's go sit down and eat." Elizabeth said, leading Neal away from Peter's room.

"I talked to the nurse" Elizabeth said as they settled into the ugly, plastic chairs that adorned the waiting room. "She told me what happened. Did you get any sleep?"

Neal shrugged. "I stayed awake so Peter could sleep."

Elizabeth chuckled softly. "And you said you didn't know how to be a friend." Neal glanced downward but not before Elizabeth noticed the slight blush coloring his cheeks. "I wasn't eavesdropping" she insisted, before taking a small bite from her croissant. "Are you ok staying with him today?" Neal nodded as he ate the last bit of his pastry.

"I'll be at work. Call me at anytime ok?" She stood, brushing a few crumbs from her skirt. "Neal I really appreciate you staying here." She leaned down and kissed him gently on his cheek. "Neal, listen to him today. Whatever Peter says, he really wants what's best for you.

Neal watched her walk away before returning to Peter's room. "How do you know what's best for me?" he asked the sleeping man, "When I don't have a clue what I want" he quietly added, before settling back in the recliner. 

Neal paced the hallway, banished from Peter's room for nearly an hour. Finally, the last nurse exited, signaling that Neal could go back in.

"Be careful, he's grouchy" she said as Neal past her. Wonderful Neal thought as he entered the room, his eyes on the figure in bed.

"Hey" he said when Peter turned his head. "How are you feeling?"

"OK" Peter quietly answered, still somewhat sleepy. The TV was on, and Peter glanced that way. "I had tickets for tonight's game" he said wearily, and then turned the TV off.

"Neal, sit. We need to talk." Neal kept his gaze downward as he did what Peter had requested. "Neal, we both know you don't want to go back to jail, right?" Neal silently shrugged, eyes glued to the floor. "Neal, I know I look like crap but please give me the courtesy of looking at me while I'm talking."

Neal smiled as he glanced at Peter. "You do like crap and you're right I don't want to go to jail. But…"

"No buts" Peter interjected. "Tomorrow Jones will pick you up at 8am sharp. Neal, open the top drawer." Neal reached for the drawer and pulled out a small book. "Rules of the Road" he read and then glanced at Peter.

"I have a driver's license…"

"Several, I know" Peter interrupted. "But you need a legit one so you'll be taking the written and road test. The bureau has a car you can use…"

"Really?"

"Crappy car." Peter chuckled; "But it will get you where you need to go."

"Where's that?" Neal asked. "How do you know where I should be when I don't?"

Peter stifled a yawn as he glared at Neal, his patented stare dulled by the drugs in his system. He knew Neal had not dealt with Kate's death and now the guilt he felt because of this; Even in his condition Peter knew that Neal could unravel at any moment and it scared him to think of what the younger man might do.

"Neal, do we need to go over your options?" Peter grew angry when Neal just shrugged and turned his head. "Damn it Neal. Turn your head and look at me!" Peter took a deep breath and closed his eyes, willing himself to control his anger. Upon opening his eyes, he noticed Neal's eyes on the door and his immediate reaction was to grab the younger's man wrist.

"Don't! Neal, don't even think about it." Neal slumped back in his chair and easily pulled his arm from Peter's grasp, hugging himself fiercely.

"I don't have the strength to argue with you" Peter said quietly, eyeing his partner. "Neal, I meant it when I said I needed you right now." Peter's voice wavered slightly and he closed his eyes.

"Haven't I done enough?" Neal ran his hands through his hair and then glanced at Peter, who was staring up at him. "I don't care how you spin it. If I hadn't done what I did, you wouldn't be in that bed would you?"

"That's probably true" Peter admitted. "Fine Neal, you want to feel guilty, go ahead. Help me because you feel guilty." Peter intently watched the younger man fight an internal battle and finally Neal seemed to relax, with his arms going slack in his lap.

"What do you need me to do?" Neal finally asked his voice full of resignation. Normally Peter would have bristled at Neal's tone, but this was not a normal time and Peter would accept any small victory he could gain where Neal was concerned. No matter what the ex-con thought, Peter wanted the best for him and he hoped someday Neal would fully come to understand that.

"I want you to be who you've been, a contributing member of my team. Neal you need to toe the line, be a boy scout…"

"I've never been a boy scout" Neal said, rolling his eyes, a small smile playing on his face.

"I'm not shocked." Peter chuckled, trying to picture Neal in a Boy Scout uniform. "You know what I mean. Neal, I won't be there to intercede if you do something stupid, understand?"

Neal nodded. "I can do that. What else?"

Peter found this part harder, more personal and he fixed the blankets around his waist, stalling for time. He wasn't one to ask for help but it was more for Elizabeth than himself, and that made it a bit easier.

"Can you help Elizabeth while I'm in here?" He eyed Neal who was watching him intently. "She's worried about doing her job, taking care of the dog and staying with me…" Peter shrugged, looking away. "I'm not exactly the easiest person to be around right now" he added more to himself than to the man beside him.

"Peter, I'll do anything for Elizabeth, you know that." And for you, Neal silently added. "What do you want me to do?"

"When you're done with work, call El and see what she needs, that's it. At least until I'm back on my feet and out of here."

"When's that?" Neal asked. "What did the doctors say this morning?"

Peter sighed. "Totally non-committal the whole bunch of them" Peter retorted, clearly disgusted with the lack of information. "Just want a little of my dignity back" he added, stifling another yawn as he tried to fix the blankets around him, finding it hard with all the tubes hanging out.

"Peter, stop it." Neal stood and adjusted the blankets for his friend. "Try to get some rest. I'll stay until Elizabeth gets back."

Peter's eyes were half-closed and he turned his head towards the TV.

"Do you want it on?"

Peter didn't answer so Neal settled back in the chair and picked up the Rules of the Road sitting on the table. It might be nice to have a legal license he thought as he started flipping through the book, with a sideways glance towards Peter, the older man already asleep.

"I'll do what I can" Neal whispered, and he meant it.


	5. Chapter 5

"How's the suit?" Neal entered his apartment, showing no surprise at finding Mozzie there.

"Getting thinner by the minute" Neal remarked as he carefully hung up his suit jacket and hat.

"Still can't eat?" Neal shook his head no as he plopped down in the chair next to the sofa. "No food until the gut heals and he's miserable and he's taking it out on Elizabeth…" Neal paused, shrugging.

"And on you" Mozzie finished for him.

"Yeah" Neal admitted.

"Yet you keep going back. Why?"

"I don't know Moz, why don't you tell me." Neal stood and started pacing, finally stopping at the balcony door, looking out at the New York skyline.

"Because he's your friend and you care." Mozzie neared the younger man. "Neal, have you looked in the mirror lately?"

"No" Neal lied.

"Maybe you should." Mozzie countered. "Running yourself into the ground isn't going to help anyone."

"What do you want me to do?" Neal threw his arms up in the air, clearly exasperated. "I'm doing what Peter asked me to. I'm going to work and then I'm helping Elizabeth." He walked over to the little fridge and pulled out a bottle of water.

"Is that dinner?"

"Mozzie, stop it. Please." Neal took a swig of water and slowly swallowed it.

"June left you dinner. You're going to sit down and eat."

Neal was about to protest but his hunger pains said otherwise. He sat down and watched as Mozzie scooped food on to two plates, immediately digging in when the plate was pushed towards him.

"Now you're going to tell me how I can help."

Neal's fork stopped in mid air as he stared at his friend.

"Hey, I like Mrs. Suit" Mozzie explained, "and I don't like seeing you kill yourself. "

"Thanks Moz" Neal said, his mouth full of food. "You'll never guess what case I started today."

"Enlighten me" Mozzie retorted.

"Scarface is back" Neal said, smiling at the look on his friend's face. "And I have a meet set up with him tomorrow." Neal added, stuffing the last of the food in his mouth.

"Really?" Mozzie rubbed his face. Scarface was known in the art world for his disfigured face and his habit of destroying precious art by throwing acid on it. "Why is he meeting you?"

"Because I have what he wants." Neal said as he scooped more stew on to his plate.

"You have The Princess?" Mozzie's eyes widen, knowing the picture had been missing for years. Once thought to have been lost during the Second World War, it had resurfaced in the mid 70's, only to disappear once again. Any art thief with credibility had looked for it at one point in time.

Neal smiled, nodding slightly. "Actually the bureau has it but I'll have it tomorrow."

"Do you need backup?" Mozzie asked, hopeful. "I've always wanted to see that picture close up."

Neal shook his head. "By the book Moz. I promised Peter I would toe the line."

"Doesn't hurt to ask" Mozzie retorted as he watched Neal finish his second helping. "Glad to see you weren't hungry" he said, ignoring the look Neal gave him. "My work is done for tonight" Mozzie added as he stood. "Be careful tomorrow." Neal watched his friend leave and then cleared the table, dumping the dirty dishes into the sink.

It took four meetings over a period of two weeks until Neal had gained Scarface's confidence and set the date when he would turn over the picture to him. Neal had been admittedly nervous but with the capable back up the meeting had gone as planned and the most elusive criminal, this side of Neal, was finally caught.

"Neal, great job" Diana said as she passed him in the hallway. "You are the talk of this place right now." Neal beamed, truly happy with the attention he was getting from the other agents. He wished Peter were there, but he knew he had a whopper of a story to tell him later, when he visited him at the hospital.

"Caffrey!" Neal tensed as he turned and saw Hughes summoning him. Slowly, with shoulders held high, he walked into his boss's office.

"Sit" Hughes ordered and Neal quickly complied, wondering what he had done this time.

"I wasn't sure about this when Peter suggested it, but I have to say, you did a good job out there today. Neal, great work…now go call Peter and tell him we finally got that son of a bitch."

"Thank you sir" Neal said as he walked out, still beaming. He headed towards Peter's office, whipping out his cell phone. Peter didn't answer the first time so he waited another five minutes but still no answer. So he called the main number and asked for Peter.

"What?" Neal listened intently and then tried Elizabeth's phone. When she didn't answer he raced back into Hughes' office, not caring that others were staring at him.

"Caffrey, what is it?" Hughes asked, rising from his seat, staring at the distraught younger man.

"It's Peter" Neal said, voice filled with panic. "They moved him to ICU and they won't say why and I can't get a hold of Elizabeth. Can…I?"

"Go!" Hughes ordered. "Call me when you know something…Neal!" Neal stopped at the door. "I have one man down already, I don't need another. Drive carefully, ok?"

Neal nodded as he sped out of the office and raced for the elevator, ignoring those who called after him.


	6. Chapter 6

Neal ran into the hospital, only stopping long enough to ask for directions to the ICU.

"Can I help you?" He was immediately confronted by a young lady dressed in white.

"I'm looking for Peter Burke" Neal said, taking a deep breath, trying to remain calm.

"Are you family?"

Neal opened his mouth, closed it, unsure how to answer that. "No…not really…We're partners, we work together."

"Sorry" she said, taking his arm and leading him towards the double doors. "Only family is allowed in here." Neal turned to protest and he saw Elizabeth sitting along a row of seats, head down.

"Elizabeth." He broke free from the nurse and raced towards her, ignoring the protests of those at the nurse's station. Elizabeth lifted her head and then stood as Neal approached her.

"Sir, I'm sorry but if you don't leave I'll have to call security."

"Elizabeth, I can't stay because I'm not family."

"Nonsense" Elizabeth said, her strong voice belying her red rimmed eyes. "Mary, he's family. Please put him on the list to visit my husband."

"Yes ma'am." The young nurse eyed Neal briefly before turning and walking away.

Elizabeth pulled Neal down to the seat next to her.

"What happened? And why are you out here? How's Peter?" Neal's questions flowed quickly.

"He's stable" Elizabeth said, as she leaned against the wall. "He started running a fever and then the monitors started beeping and he was having trouble catching his breath." Elizabeth lowered her head, grateful when she felt Neal's hand on her shoulder. "They believe its septic shock but he didn't respond to the initial treatment so they brought him here for intensive therapy." She glanced at Neal as a fresh round of tears welled up. "Physically he's better, just requiring some extra oxygen but…" Elizabeth closed her eyes.

"Neal, I think he's giving up" she finished a few minutes later.

"No." Neal shook his head. "Peter would keep fighting."

Elizabeth smiled sadly. "He's always been a man in control and he doesn't know how to deal with this. Neal, he hasn't talked to me all day, and he won't even look at me."

"Can I see him?" Neal quietly asked.

"No." Elizabeth glanced at the clock on the wall. "They have strict visiting hours and no one is allowed back in for another hour." She leaned back against the wall, once again closing her eyes to a world she had hoped would never evade her life. She felt Neal take her hand and she took some comfort knowing the man next to her cared about her husband and was willing to take this journey with them.

"Elizabeth, wake up." Neal nudged her gently as he watched the other families file into the ICU in a trance like fashion.

"Neal, have you ever been in an ICU?" He shook his head no. "At least they have curtains for each bed" Elizabeth said as she entered, Neal following closely behind her. Peter's bed was the last one on the left side of the room and Neal was uncharacteristically nervous as they neared his partner.

"Hey hon." Elizabeth bent over and stroked Peter's cheek. "I'm going to leave for a little while and Neal is going to stay with you ok?" Neal wanted to run as fast and as far as he could but this ceased being about him long ago. When Peter didn't respond, Elizabeth glanced at Neal, clearly worried.

"Peter." Neal spoke softly as he sat in the chair with his face close to Peter. Elizabeth watched for a few minutes and satisfied that her husband was in good hands, she quietly walked out.

"Peter, I know you hear me so please look at me." Neal reached out but with all the tubes and wiring he wasn't sure what part of his friend was safe to touch. Finally he settled on Peter's hand and tentatively touched him before grasping Peter's hand firmly.

"Elizabeth thinks you're giving up but you better keep fighting. You're fighting for both of us, got it? If you die I run and I guarantee you no one will find me. Peter I like where I am right now but it's because you're here and I'm not sure what I would do if you died also." Neal turned his head away, the memories of Kate's death all too close to the surface. He felt some pressure on his hand and turned to see Peter watching him.

"I don't think I'm getting out of here" Peter whispered.

"Yes you are" Neal quickly countered. "You were doing better since they closed you up…this is a small bump in the road. OK maybe a big bump" he amended, as Peter rolled his eyes. "Promise me you won't give up, ok?"

"Not in my vocabulary" Peter said, as he shifted uncomfortably in bed. "Your turn" he said, staring up at Neal.

Neal shrugged, unsure of what Peter wanted.

"Promise me you'll stay and finish your sentence even if I die."

Neal turned his head, away from Peter's gaze. No, he couldn't promise that and Peter knew it.

"Neal?" Peter's voice was a desperate whisper. "Elizabeth considers you family. She'll need you if I'm not around." Peter closed his eyes, as the conversation was taking a physical toll on his already weakened state. Neal watched him, mulling his options. He had never lied to Peter; at least that is what he claimed. He couldn't imagine sticking around if Peter died, but there was Elizabeth and June to consider. Not to mention Mozzie, who seemed to have a penchant for New York City.

"Rest Peter" Neal said gently, squeezing his hand. "I'm not going anyway" he added, the meaning unclear.

The minutes dragged and Neal was bored. Peter slept fretfully, moaning often and occasionally opening his eyes. Neal tried several times to free his numb hand but each time Peter's hand closed tighter, even though he was apparently sleeping. Several times during the hour, one of the nurses would come by to check Peter's stats and murmur that he was stable before walking on to the next patient. The ICU was quiet, though Neal could sometimes hear muffled sobs.

"Sir, you need to leave for now, visiting hours are over." Neal stared at the nurse standing over him and then reached for Peter's hand, gently untangling his own. He freed himself but the minute he stood, Peter reached out and grabbed his wrist with a surprisingly strong grip.

"Peter, are you awake?" It was hard to tell because the agent's eyes were closed and he made no other movements.

"Peter, you need to calm down." The nurse leaned over Peter talking to him softly as she gazed up at his heart monitor.

"What's wrong?" Neal asked.

"Heart rate is going up" she responded, her eyes still on the monitor.

"Maybe he doesn't want to be alone" Neal commented.

"Peter." The blonde young woman turned her attention back to the patient. "I'll let your friend stay as long as you remain calm, ok?" Peter made a half hearted attempt at a nod and the nurse scurried off, returning a few minutes later. Neal watched her put something in the IV but he didn't bother asking, didn't want to know.

"Stay quiet and out of the way of the doctors as they make their rounds" she ordered, eyeing Neal.

He nodded before sitting back down. "You have a way with the ladies" Neal whispered as he removed Peter's hand from his wrist and returned it to its proper spot, encased in his own hand. He thought Peter smirked but soon the older man was sleeping soundly and somewhat peacefully. The doctors came by and again muttered the same word, stable…though one mentioned Peter could break out in a day or two.

Neal went back to watching the clock and wondering when Elizabeth would be back. It was hard to see Peter like this, so physically weak, but his spirit was still there and he was fighting and that's all anyone could ask. Neal was leaning over the bed, eyes half closed when he heard monitors start beeping and the unmistakable sounds of someone crying. The commotion lasted nearly fifteen minutes and in the silence of the ICU he heard the doctor announce the time of death. Neal stared down at Peter, knowing he was awake even if his eyes were closed. Neal squeezed Peter's hand and let his free hand rest gently on Peter's head.

Stable was good Neal silently thought, especially in here.


	7. Chapter 7

Neal whistled as he walked from the parking lot to the hospital. If he were honest with himself he wasn't sure he was happy, it had been a long time since he truly felt that emotion but he was content and he was satisfied with his life and he never thought that was possible after Kate died. Peter was better, and after two days in the ICU, he was finally in his old room. Work was good and again, something Neal never thought he needed or wanted in hi s life…co-workers who valued him and trusted his opinion and it felt good when they complimented him on a job well done.

"Who am I?" Neal asked, and not for the first time. 'And where do I go from here' he wondered, as he held the door open for an old lady. The future was never Neal's concern; he lived for the moment and only the moment, but now, he saw a brighter future although he was afraid to look beyond his four year commitment.

Many times, before Peter got shot, he had tried to broach the subject with his partner but the time never seemed right or something got in the way. He envisioned a little party, a pat on the back as he walked out of the bureau for the last time, and then what? Neal never liked to think that far because as much as he wanted his freedom, it scared him more than he was ready to admit.

Neal entered Peter's room, stopping suddenly, staring at the sight before him. Elizabeth was lying in bed with her husband, holding him in her arms, as if he were a child she was trying to comfort.

Elizabeth smiled at the befuddled look on the younger man's face, noticing that he was slowly backing out of the room.

"Neal, don't go" she whispered, her hand gently rubbing Peter's back. "He's sound asleep and I don't think anything will wake him up right now."

"What happened?" Neal asked, managing to take one step forward, keeping his eyes squarely on Elizabeth's face.

"He was angry this morning and demanding and I didn't like his tone so I yelled and I told him to stop acting like a child and finally…" Elizabeth paused as she wrapped her arms tighter around Peter. "Neal, finally he broke and he cried and he apologized over and over about how he's been treating me and he talked about how scared he's been."

"He's not the only one who cried" Neal stated, noticing her red, swollen eyes.

"But I always cry" Elizabeth said, her eyes glistening. "Neal, you know how stoic and quiet he's been, I truly thought he had given up…"

"He didn't give up" Neal said firmly.

"No, he didn't" Elizabeth agreed. "But he did think he was going to die that first day in ICU and I know how hard it was for him to admit that. But he's feeling better and they started him on a liquid diet today and if all goes well, physical therapy starts tomorrow."

"That's good" Neal commented as he stared at his friend. "How'd you managed to do this without pulling out any wires?"

Elizabeth could only laugh at the off the wall comment. "Carefully" she finally answered. "Peter also talked to Diana today and I'm not sure what she said, but Peter's very proud of you." Neal shrugged, wondering what the two agents talked about.

Elizabeth took an envelope off the table and held it out to Neal. "You have the night off. Peter found an art exhibit that he thought you might like." Neal stared at the address written on the envelope and back at Elizabeth.

"It's out of my radius" he quietly said.

"Not tonight. You have two tickets in your name waiting at the door. Plus there's money in there for dinner."

Neal shook his head. "I can't…"

"Yes you can. Neal you've earn this night and Peter wanted to do it for you. Now go, have fun, ok?"

"Thanks." Neal smiled shyly.

"Neal, Peter said to tell you two things. One, stay in New York and two, make sure you're on time tomorrow for work." Elizabeth chuckled. "Can you manage that?"

"Yeah" Neal grinned. "I'll be back tomorrow after work. You still have that dinner thing right?"

"It's a banquet and yes, as long as nothing changes, I would like to be there. Go, enjoy yourself tonight."

Elizabeth watched him go and then lowered her chin on Peter's head. "You did a good thing today " she whispered to her sleeping husband.

"You're late" Peter barked as Neal entered the hospital room.

"And you're sitting up" Neal commented, ignoring the look his partner gave him. "And why am I late?" Neal studied his friend, noting he was in a wheelchair and apparently wire free. He had one blanket wrapped around his shoulders and another folded neatly in his lap.

"Are we going somewhere?" Neal asked.

"There's a deck on the third floor and it's sunny out." Peter shrugged, somewhat embarrassed as he looked over his shoulder, out the window. "They unhooked me for two hours…"

"And I've already wasted part of that time by being late" Neal finished for him. "Let's get going." Neal said as he pushed Peter out of the room.

The deck was empty except for an older patient on the far side, who seemed to be sleeping. Peter's eyes were closed and his face upward, towards the sun, smiling slightly.

"I wasn't sure I'd ever feel the sun again" Peter said, as his head turned towards Neal. "Ever want something so badly and never think you'd get it?" The words were out before Peter realized what he had said and he caught Neal gazing down at his ankle.

"Neal, the four years will go by quickly and you'll be free."

"I know" Neal quietly whispered, as he bent over, resting his chin on his folded hands.

"Neal, it's what you want isn't it?"

"Of course" Neal smiled brightly as he stood. "Who wouldn't want to be free?"

"Neal, why haven't you told me about Scarface?" Peter asked, wanting to change the subject.

"I was going to but the time never seemed right." Neal walked towards the edge and gazed down at the people below. He felt eyes on him and turned to catch Peter watching him. Casually he strolled back and sat down next to Peter.

"Neal, what's wrong?"

"I don't know" Neal admitted. "Nothing" he quickly added. "Besides you have more important things to worry about like getting back on your feet." Peter had seen Neal close himself off like that so many times in the past that he let the subject drop.

"How was last night" Peter asked after several minutes of awkward silence.

"Last night" Neal mumbled, with his mind wandering. "Peter I'm sorry" he said when it dawned on him that he hadn't thanked him. "I forgot you set it up. Thank you! I took Mozzie and it was an interesting show. The artist did some amazing abstract paintings and you wouldn't believe…"Neal drifted on for a few more minutes until he realized that Peter's eyes were closed and he was listing to one side.

"Hey Peter." Neal crouched in front of him. "I'm taking you back to your room."

"Not now" Peter mumbled as Neal undid the wheel locks.

"Yes, now" Neal countered. "You're falling asleep and you'll be more comfortable in your bed. If you want, I'll let you beat me at War."

"You can't cheat playing War" Peter said as they entered the building.

"You can cheat at anything" Neal retorted.

"You would know" Peter said, pleased when he got in the last word, both turning quiet as they made their way back to Peter's room .

Elizabeth returned much later than she had expected but she had to smile when she walked into Peter's room. Her husband was asleep in bed, snoring loudly while Neal was passed out in the recliner, also snoring. She decided not to wake either and quickly wrote a note before heading home.


	8. Chapter 8

"You're home early."

Neal tensed as he closed the door and carefully hung up his jacket. "Why are you here?" he asked the man sitting on his couch.

"I wanted some wine" Mozzie commented. "And I assumed you would be babysitting the suit tonight."

"Peter is feeling better and he doesn't need someone with him." Neal grabbed the bottle of wine from his friend and poured a glass for himself.

"Peter was right" Mozzie said before taking a small sip.

"You talked to Peter." Neal slammed his glass on the counter, jumping back when it shattered in pieces.

"That's good wine you're wasting" Mozzie retorted as they both watched the red liquid drip over the edge of the counter. Neal grabbed a towel and started cleaning the counter.

"Careful" Mozzie warned as the younger man kneeled on the floor and started picking up the small pieces of glass.

"Damn it." Neal lifted his hand in pain and watched the blood drip from his thumb.

"Yeah, you're just wonderful" Mozzie mumbled as he headed towards the bathroom, returning a few minutes later with a wash cloth.

"Let me see." He grabbed Neal's hand and carefully inspected the thumb. "You'll live. Clean it off and put a Band-Aid on it." While Neal was tending to his thumb, Mozzie found a broom and swept up the glass, carefully tossing it in the waste basket.

"Are you going to tell me what's wrong?" Mozzie asked once Neal was seated with a new glass of wine.

"What did Peter say?" Neal countered.

"How often have I said don't answer a question with a question?"

"You just did it."

"To make a point" Mozzie rolled his eyes. "Now tell me what's wrong."

"I don't know" Neal said. "Nothing" he added.

"Wow" Mozzie exclaimed. "That's exactly what Peter said you would say. Your keeper sure knows you well, doesn't he?"

"Don't call him that." Neal stood, clearly agitated.

"Neal, sit and talk to me." Mozzie lowered his voice and calmly spoke to the younger man, and then silently waited until Neal walked out his rage and finally sat.

"Moz, I honestly don't know what's wrong" Neal said as he sat across from his friend. Neal lowered his gaze, staring at the floor.

"I think you do" Mozzie quietly said as he leaned over and tapped Neal's shoulder. "Is it about your keeper?"

Neal glanced up, starring daggers. "I told you…"

"Sorry, hard habit to break." Mozzie backed off, arms held up in surrender.

"Is it about Peter?" Mozzie asked, not ready to give up.

"Not really" Neal admitted. "It's more selfish." He shrugged, again staring at the floor.

"Is is bigger than a bread basket?"

Neal looked up, failing to hide the smile that flittered across his face. "Mozzie, what happens to me after my four years with the bureau?"

Mozzie frowned, clearly not expecting that question. "Haven't I taught you not to look ahead?"

Neal sighed, as he took a deep breath. "Hard not to after Kate's death and Peter getting shot."

"Neal, you'll be a free man, you can do what you want to do."

"And what's that?" Neal stood and started that dreadful pacing again, much to Mozzie's chagrin.

"Neal, if you don't sit I'm going to tie you to the bed post."

Neal stopped and smiled. "You and what army?" he asked, clearly amused at the threat from the smaller man.

"Fine" Mozzie said as he stood and walked towards the door. "You know where to find me when you want to talk." He started to open the door.

"Moz, you always said there are no happy endings for guys like us."

Mozzie eyed his friend, and it was obvious how torn up Neal was about his future.

"Neal, maybe we're not as alike as you thought we were. Maybe you found something that you enjoy…maybe a place to belong." Mozzie chuckled. "Neal, I wouldn't think any less of you if you were a suit." With that Mozzie walked out, shutting the door behind him.

Peter was bored, he was restless and he wanted his freedom, but he was not depressed as Elizabeth had suggested and he refused to accept the counseling that had been offered.

"I'm not crazy" he muttered as he tossed the newspaper aside.

"Talking to yourself is the first sign."

Peter jumped as he eyed the man standing near the doorway, seemingly just materializing out of thin air. "How the hell do you do that?"

Mozzie shrugged. "Secrets, suit. Never reveal your secrets."

"Whatever." Peter was too annoyed to care.

"I talked to our mutual friend" Mozzie stated.

"And?" Peter asked.

"He has an annoying penchant for pacing that I've never noticed before."

Peter calmly rolled his eyes. "Did you figure out what's bothering him?"

"Not exactly" Mozzie admitted. "We both know how much Neal likes to talk about himself" he added, walking closer to the bed. "What happens to Neal after his four years with the FBI?"

"I don't know." Peter replied. "He's free…free to do anything he wants on the right side of the law."

"Of course" Mozzie remarked. "And if he breaks the law again?"

"I catch him" Peter proclaimed. "It's what I do best…" Or did best he silently mused, wondering if he was ever going to be the same.

"Mozzie, what are you getting at?"

"I think Neal is breaking the cardinal sin in our line of work."

"Stop with the riddles Mozzie and spit it out." Peter swung his pajama clad legs from beneath the blanket and carefully sat up, grabbing his crutches in the process. Slowly he stood, leaning heavily on the crutches for support.

"I see you're back on your feet" Mozzie muttered, grimacing as he watched Peter navigate the few feet to the window, surprised at how heavy the agent was breathing.

"Are you sure you're supposed to be doing this?" he asked.

"I'm fine" Peter managed to say between deep breaths. "I've been in that damn bed for almost two months and I want my life back." Peter leaned against the window sill for support as he stared out the window.

"I'm sure Neal felt the same way when he was in jail" Mozzie muttered.

"I didn't break the law" Peter countered. "Now tell me. What do you think is wrong with him?"

"He's thinking about his future and I think his prospects scare him. Is there a real job for him…with you…when his four years are up?"

Peter couldn't help but smile as he stared down at the shorter man. It was something he had thought about before and even made inquiries but he always assumed Neal would be out the door and on a plane the moment his sentence was complete.

"Is that what Neal wants?" Peter tentatively asked.

"He didn't say that but it's what I deduced from his behavior." Mozzie shrugged. "I've known him for a long time and between Kate's death and your shooting…I think he's rethinking his former life."

"Maybe Peter Pan is finally growing up" Peter whispered more to himself than the man beside him. "If Neal convinces me that's what he wants, I'll see what I can do."

"That's all I can ask" Mozzie said as he neared the door, stopping with his hand on the door knob. "Suit, I'm glad you're ok" he said before quickly exiting the little hospital room.

Peter smiled as he continued to watch the world outside. Maybe things were looking up after all.


	9. Chapter 9

Neal had impeccable timing and for most of his life it had served him well. Today was not one of those days. First thing he noticed when he entered Peter's room was the empty bed. Scanning the room, he easily found the bed's occupant, seated on the floor with his back to the door, shoulders heaving as if he were breathing hard.

"Hey Neal" said a voice to the con man's right. He turned to see the physical therapist leaning against the wall, arms calmly folded across his chest. Neal nodded as his eyes searched the rest of the room, the scattered magazines on the floor, the overturned lamp that dangled precariously from the little table and the water that was dripping near Peter. Silently, Neal's eyes darted from Peter to the therapist as he waited for someone to say something.

The therapist made the first move, as he took two steps toward Peter.

"Peter, if you're still here tomorrow, we will continue." The young man smiled at Neal as he passed him and exited the room.

Neal eyed his partner before cautiously walking towards him.

"Peter?" Neal lowered himself to the floor, settling beside his friend. "Are you ok?" Peter chuckled. "Sorry…" he spit out between deep breaths. "The Peter Burke pity party is not open for new members." Peter turned his whole body, shielding himself from Neal's worried look.

"Peter, what happened?"

"What do you think happened?" Peter found the sanctity of the wall and burrowed himself against it. "I just wanted to take one step on my own…no crutches and no cane. Just my own damn feet" he added forlornly. "And you can see what…happened…" his voice broke and he buried his face against the wall, willing himself to calm down. He had no intention of crying in front of Neal and then he heard it…sniffling from his partner.

"Neal, why are you crying?"

"Guilt" the younger man admitted freely, as he swiped at his face.

"Get over it" Peter barked, pulling away from the wall. "I have." Peter straightened up and reached for a flyer that was lying near one of the magazines. "Read this" he said as he handed it to Neal.

"FBI NYPD charity basketball game" Neal read and then noted the date. "Four months from now…who is David Bird?"

"NYPD" Peter answered. "He lost his brother on 9/11 and he put this game together to raise money for the families." Peter chuckled. "We kicked their butts four years ago and that's the last time we played. Suddenly he found other ways to raise money that wasn't so humiliating."

"So why now?" Neal asked.

"Because he's a good guy and he knows how badly I want to play. Give me something to aim for." Peter laughed. "Knowing Dave, he talked to the doctor and found out exactly when I'll be seventy percent back to normal, enough to play but not do well. You can play this year, ok?"

"No way" Neal said as he tossed the flyer aside. "You want to win, don't you?"

"No." Peter shook his head. "This year is not about winning and I want you to play."

Neal shrugged as he suddenly recalled what the therapist had said.

"Peter, are you going home tomorrow?"

"Maybe" Peter answered. "Depends on the tests they're running today."

"What tests?" Neal asked. "You and Elizabeth have been tight lipped about your health for a while now and I wish you'd let me know what's going on."

"Neal, I'm fine…"

"Peter, don't. Please don't lie to me."

Peter shifted on the hard, uncomfortable floor. "Help me up." Neal stood first and carefully hauled Peter to his feet and helped him to the bed.

"Neal, we haven't told you everything because you've been moody for a while now and I didn't want to add to it. Hey, you know you can talk to me right?"

"Yeah" Neal answered casually, "but you've already talked to Moz so why bother."

Peter bristled at his tone but calmly chose to ignore it. "It's tough when others care about you isn't it?

Neal shrugged. "It takes time getting used to" he quietly said. "Anything good in my life, I've always managed to screw up. Peter, just tell me you're going to be ok."

"I'm going to be ok" Peter remarked, smiling. "Neal, I will be" Peter assured him, ignoring the blues eyes glaring at him.

"Peter, the truth."

"OK." Peter sighed. "My kidneys have not been real happy since I crashed and that's been causing my blood pressure to sky rocket, especially in the morning." Peter took a breath shrugging. "There's been talk of dialysis and that's why I've been in here so long…they've been trying to get everything straightened out and things are starting to look better."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Neal, I already told you why" Peter exclaimed wearily. "How long are you going to blame yourself?"

"As long as I watch you suffer" Neal answered truthfully.

"Neal, we can't keep doing this dance." Peter was tired of playing games with his partner.

"I have told you on more than one occasion that you are more than my charge, that I consider you a friend. I trust you and Elizabeth trusts you but I can't watch you continually beat yourself up over what happened. Neal, listen to me carefully. I have to deal with my health and my first priority is keeping Elizabeth sane during this. If you can't get over what happened, then maybe its best you stay away for a while, ok?" As hard as that was to stay, Peter knew it was the right thing the minute he said it. Neal needed a break as much as he did, but he doubted the younger man would admit it.

"Neal, go home. I'll call you in couple of days, I promise." Neal stayed still, head hung low as he contemplated what Peter said. He glanced at Peter once and Peter could see how close to tears he was but to the younger man's credit, he held it together long enough to nod his head and flee the hospital room.

"That went well" Peter muttered as he grabbed the remote and flipped the TV on.

In the privacy and quiet of the car, and for the first time since the shooting, Neal sobbed uncontrollably. Curled up in the front seat, hidden below the window, he hugged himself as the tears flowed freely down his cheeks. Twenty minutes later he drove home.


	10. Chapter 10

The doorbell rang and Peter stood up, grimacing when he put full weight on his bad knee. Limping slightly he walked towards the door, wondering who the heck would be bothering him this early in the morning.

"It's you."

"Good morning suit. Mind if I come in?" Mozzie didn't bother waiting for an answer as he walked by the agent.

"Sure, no problem" Peter said to the empty doorway. He turned to see Mozzie scrutinizing him.

"What?"

"You look…" Mozzie struggled to find the right words. "You look like yourself" he finished as he eyed the project Peter was working on.

"Thank you…I think" Peter said as he lowered himself to the floor. "Elizabeth has been asking me for ages to touch up this cabinet and fix the door." He eyed the hanging door. "Can't quite get the hinge to work" he muttered as he grabbed a screw driver.

"Neal could fix that in no time."

"Mozzie, don't" Peter said sternly. "Neal is fine. I talked to him last night."

"And when's the last time you saw him?"

Rolling his eyes, Peter mentally did the math.

"It will be four weeks tomorrow…but I have it on good authority he's fine."

"And how long is your Neal furlough going to last?"

"Mozzie!" Peter slammed the screw driver to the floor, scaring the dog in the process. "Sorry Satch." Peter scratched the dog's head, calming himself in the process.

"Mozzie let me tell you a story."

"If you must" the smaller man interjected.

"I must" Peter remarked as he handed the extra paint brush to the strange man kneeling next to him. "After I got shot I took it upon myself to teach Neal a lesson. To show him that actions have consequences and innocent people get caught in the crossfire."

"So that's why you made him a slave?"

"He wasn't a slave and we really did need the help. I just wanted Neal to see up close the pain others go through when a con goes wrong."

"It was your con" Mozzie remarked.

"Yeah it was." Peter admitted. "But the sniper was someone who wanted Neal dead, someone who Neal brought in to our little game. Without the third party, nothing would have gone wrong."

"You assume" Mozzie said.

"I know." Peter countered.

"Suit, is there a point to this story?"

"Yeah there is" Peter quietly said. "I screwed up and now I'm trying to fix it."

"And I'm lost" Mozzie retorted as he grabbed the tool from Peter's hand. "Hold the door like this" he ordered and in a matter of minutes the hinge was tight.

"How is keeping Neal away helping him?"

"Because I'm a daily reminder of what he did and we both know the guilt was eating away at him."

"Not buying that." Mozzie said as he started pacing around a nervous dog. "I think you're keeping Neal away because you feel guilty at how guilty he feels."

"Probably" Peter admitted, amazed that he actually understood the little man's logic. "How do I fix it?"

Mozzie laughed as he looked upward. "The suit is asking me for help" he muttered, as he silently waited for the lightning bolt to strike.

"I'll let you in on a little secret" Mozzie said after a few minutes of silence. "Neal was devastated when he thought you had Kate, that you were the ring man. Neal trusts you and for someone like Neal, trust trumps love."

"So?" Peter clearly looked confused.

"Do I have to spell it out for you?" Mozzie stopped pacing long enough to waves his arms frantically. "And you're the brains of the FBI? No wonder this country is going to pieces."

"Mozzie, that's enough." Peter barked. "Just tell me what you're trying to say."

"Neal was devastated when Kate died but he wasn't questioning his existence and his future. He knew life would go on and one day he'd find love again. All that changed when you almost died. Peter, I don't know how it happened or why but Neal found something in you…something to anchor him in reality and make him think about a life in the real world on the right side of the law." Mozzie shrugged. "Don't ask me why or what he sees but he does."

"So, what do I do?" Peter quietly asked, as he let Mozzie's words sink in.

"Simple" Mozzie answered. "Don't betray him. Be the friend he wants to believe you are."

"I am his friend" Peter stated firmly.

"Good." Mozzie smirked. "Problem solved." Mozzie headed towards the door. "Suit, have you thought about our other discussion?"

"I have" Peter smiled. "Papers are filled out, signed by the right people and ready to be mailed. All I need is Neal's signature."

"Suit, you can't get that without seeing Neal, can you?" Mozzie was out the door before Peter could open his mouth.

"Smart ass" he said, chuckling. "Satch, I think it's about time we invite Neal over. What do you think?" Peter took the wagging tail as an affirmative and reached for his phone.


	11. Chapter 11

It was a sunny, cool Saturday morning and Neal took advantage of the waning fall weather to enjoy his cup of coffee outside on the roof.

"Can I join you?" Neal looked up and smiled as the owner of the house walked towards him.

"Of course" Neal replied as he poured June a cup of coffee. "Won't be long before it's too cold to do this" she said as she took a small sip of the warm, soothing liquid.

"Any plans today?" June asked, breaking the comfortable silence.

"Yeah" Neal answered, smiling slightly. "I'm going over to Peter's for dinner."

"It's about time that man regained his senses" June exclaimed with a bit of annoyance in her voice.

"June, don't." Neal pleaded. "He thinks he's doing me a favor."

"Nonsense" June said with a genuine smile. "Peter's a good man but he's wrong here and you know it."

Neal sighed, and took a deep breath. "June, I'm not a child and Peter is doing what he thinks is best for me. Besides, he made sure I've had plenty to keep me busy."

"Neal, you're not a good liar…" June held her hand up when Neal started to protest. "I was married to a con man and I can tell when you're lying."

"June, what do you want me to say? What can I say that doesn't make me sound like I'm five years old? Yeah, it hurt but he didn't walk away and…I'm fine, really." Neal looked away, clearly embarrassed.

"Neal, did your father walk away?"

"What?" Neal exclaimed loudly, shaking his head. "No. Why would you ask that?"

"Just worried about you dear" June quietly said as she stood. "I didn't mean to pry into your life."

"June, wait." Neal grabbed the older woman's hand. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell. You've done so much for me…if you really want to know I'll tell you." June contemplated her options, finally choosing to sit back down and let Neal talk.

"Neal, I'd like to know about your past but only if you're willing to tell me."

Neal shuddered as an east wind suddenly turned the air cooler. His mind raced with his jumbled thoughts as he quickly, silently rattled off all of his options. Finally he settled on the truth and hoped he was doing the right thing.

He rested his folded hands calmly on the table and smiled wearily at the older woman. "June, I won't bother lying…" he paused and shrugged, trying to ease the tension in his shoulders.

"My father was out of the picture long before I knew he should be there. In fact, I don't know his name and I've never seen a picture. I believe my mother loved me but some people are not meant to be parents. My earliest memories are of us moving from one rat infested place to another, running from bill collectors and maybe child services." As Neal talked he kept his gaze lowered only glancing up when he heard June gasp. "Should I continue?" he quietly asked.

June nodded, not trusting her voice at that moment.

"My mom couldn't keep a job. She tried but she had too many demons and an all consuming love of the bottle. If she were alive today I'm sure she'd be tagged with one of those new age mental disorders that doctors love to use these days. As it was she was bearable on her good days and a monster the rest of the time."

"Neal, who took care of you?" June asked, though she figured she already knew the answer.

"I did" he answered matter-of-factly. "My thievery started at a young age but back then it really was about survival." The more he talked; the faster Neal's fingers tapped the table until June reached over and firmly encased his hand in hers. Briefly they made eye contact but Neal couldn't handle the pity he saw and quickly looked away.

"Neal, I'm so sorry. I wish…" June paused and wiped her tears that flowed freely. "I wish we could go back in time so I could take care of that little boy."

"I don't" Neal spit out forcibly. "I lived it and I survived and now you can see why I don't look back." The silence engulfed them, each lost in their own thoughts.

"Neal, what happened to your mother?" Neal sighed as his eyes darted around, never able to focus on June's face.

"I came home from school and she was in bed sleeping. I was angry because she should have been working and I knew she'd lost her job again and we'd be leaving and then I saw the empty bottle of vodka and the bottle of sleeping pills. I tried to wake her…" Neal paused, again tapping his fingers. "I couldn't wake her." Neal took a couple of deep breaths, as he ran his hands through his hair.

"After they took her away, I asked for a few minutes to gather my things." Neal smiled wearily. "While the cops waited outside I ran out the back and I didn't stop running until I reached the city."

"Neal, how old were you?"

"Fifteen" he quietly answered. "I invented Neal Caffrey when I was fifteen and I've never looked back. I became everything I wasn't and I found ways to get what I wanted or needed."

"Neal, I'm sorry. I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything" Neal said. "June, as far as I'm concerned my past doesn't exist. It's not an explanation for who I am now and it's definitely not an excuse." Neal laughed suddenly. "If Peter knew, I can only imagine what he would say."

"What would he say?" June asked.

"He'd tell me to grow up. That many people have bad childhoods and they don't grow up to be felons." The smile slowly faded from his face. "I'd like Peter to know but I'm not sure I could tell him."

"I would if you want me to" June suggested.

Neal shrugged. "If the time is right, it's fine with me." Neal's phone rang and he reached for it, and then read the text message, breaking out in a hearty over the top laugh.

"What's so funny?" June asked and then waited until Neal calmed down. "It's from Elizabeth. She asked me to get Peter out of the house before she kills him." Neal stood. "I need to get ready." He walked towards the balcony door, stopping before he opened it.

"June, thank you for listening."

She nodded and watched Neal walk inside. "Neal, lie to yourself all you want" she spoke softly to herself. "But that little boy is very much a part of who you are today." As June gathered up the empty coffee cups, she made a vow, that Neal would never be alone again.


	12. Chapter 12

"Hey Neal" Elizabeth whispered, as she opened the door.

"Who's here?" Neal could hear Peter bellowing from inside the house.

Thank you Elizabeth mouthed as she motioned for Neal to enter.

"A little early for dinner isn't it?" Peter asked as he eyed the figure following his wife into the house.

"Good to see you too" Neal calmly commented as he scrutinized the man sitting on the sofa. "You look good" he added, a smile playing on his face. "How about we get out of here so your wife doesn't kill you?"

"I'm watching football" Peter said, his eyes darting from Neal to his wife. "Besides, this is my house and I don't have to leave if I don't want to."

"I see what you mean" Neal quietly said.

"Peter, it's Saturday and it's college football. There will be another game on after this and probably another one after that. Please go upstairs, get dressed and go out." Something in his wife's tone made Peter sit up and take notice.

"Fine" he muttered as he shut the TV off. Peter stood with a quiet groan as he walked slowly towards the staircase.

"How is he?" Neal asked once Peter was out of ear shot. "The truth Elizabeth" Neal demanded before she had a chance to get a word out.

"The truth is he's fine if I don't kill him." She smiled wearily. "He gets weekly blood draws and so far his kidneys are within normal range. He's still on a special diet but slowly he's getting back to his normal appetite." Elizabeth led Neal towards the kitchen and handed him a small bag. "These are the pills he'll have to take while you're out, all color coded and time marked."

"Elizabeth, do you think he's ready to go back to work Monday?"

"I think we're both more than ready" she answered. "Neal, he's anxious and he's nervous but he needs to go back to work and get on with his life. We both do." They both heard Peter yelling and then something hit the wall. Neal looked over at Elizabeth with eyes wide.

"It's nothing" she said, laughing. "He still has trouble getting his right sock on. I need to go help him."

Fifteen minute later, Neal was seated on the sofa, petting the dog when Peter finally was ready.

"Where are we going?" Peter gruffly asked as he put his jacket on.

Neal shrugged, glancing at Elizabeth for help.

"Go for a drive" she suggested. "Wherever you go, bring back dessert for tonight, ok?" Elizabeth grabbed the cane and handed it to her husband. "In case you do any walking" she said.

"Wait" Peter said as he opened the door. "El, where's that envelope?" he asked. Elizabeth nodded and walked away, returning a few minutes later with a large manila envelope. Neal glanced at it questioningly but stayed silent as he followed Peter out of the house.

They drove in silence until Neal parked near a play ground about two miles from the Burke's home. Neal eyed the bakery across the street.

"They have the best espresso in town" Neal stated as he turned the engine off.

"Can we sit outside for a bit?" Peter suggested, pointing towards a bench.

"It's a little cold…"

"It's fine" Peter interrupted, grabbing his cane and hauling himself out of the car. Neal easily caught up to his friend and slowed his pace to match Peter's. The bench was near a small retention pond and they both sat and watched a small family of ducks, swimming in a single line.

"Do you think that's a learned trait or are they born with it?" Neal asked, breaking the awkward silence. Peter glanced his way and then back at the ducks. "Not a clue" he mumbled as he zipped his jacket up. "Neal, I'm sorry" Peter quietly said, eyeing his friend. "Asking you to stay away wasn't about you. It was me…I felt guilty about you blaming yourself and I didn't want to see you like that…I'm sorry if you saw it any other way."

Neal kept his eyes glued on the ducks, the only movement a small twitch in his face as he bit down on his lower lip.

"Neal, are you ok?"

"Yeah", the younger man answered.

"Are we ok?"

Neal nodded his head yes. "It was a nice touch, you orchestrating my social life."

"What do you mean?" Peter asked.

"Didn't you ask Jones and Diana to keep me busy?"

"No." Peter shook his head. "I sent Elizabeth your way a few times but as you saw today, she needed to get away from me."

"Maybe they felt sorry for me" Neal said, rather glumly.

"Maybe they enjoyed your company and wanted to spend time with you" Peter quickly countered. "Neal, you're part of the team and I've heard nothing but good things from everyone including Hughes. You know I'm proud of you, don't you?"

"Just doing what you asked me to do" he said.

"No." Peter wouldn't accept that. "It's more than that and you know it." Peter suddenly produced the envelope from beneath his jacket and handed it to Neal. "Read this over and think about it. I don't need an answer today."

Neal glanced at Peter before taking the envelope and slowly opening it. Peter watched him intently as Neal poured over the job application, his only reaction a slight shaking of his hands.

"Peter, is this for real?"

Peter nodded. "Just needs your signature and the job will be waiting when your four years are up."

"A real job?" Neal asked.

"Neal, obviously there will be limitations to what you can do, but yes it's a real job with pay and benefits. You'll have to go though some training and get your GED." Neal glanced at Peter several times, his face full of emotion.

"I don't know" Neal said, shaking his head. "Peter, I don't know if I want to do this when I'm free. I'm only here because I have to be." He lowered his gaze, towards his foot and his constant companion wrapped around his ankle.

"It may have started that way" Peter agreed. "And you can do what you want when you're free. Neal, just think about it." Peter grabbed the papers from Neal and carefully placed them back in the envelope. "It's an option, if you choose to stay here. "

"Peter, if I stay, I'm only going to disappoint you. You know I'm going to screw up just like I did when you got shot."

"I'm willing to take that chance" Peter said as he glanced at his watch. "It's time for my meds and it's getting colder. Let's go across the street and get some of that espresso you mentioned"

They both ordered an espresso and a piece of pie. Peter quietly ate as he listened to Neal retell the highlights of the past few weeks.

"I think Diana's girlfriend digs me" Neal said as he forked some apple filling into his mouth.

"Neal, don't go there" Peter warned.

"OK, she digs my artistic knowledge" Neal revised before returning his attention to his pie. Peter took that time to really look at Neal and he didn't like what he saw. He was always thin but it was obvious he had lost weight and he had deep, dark circles under his eyes.

"Neal, are you still having trouble sleeping?"

"Huh?" Neal looked at Peter. "No, I'm fine." Neal put his fork down. "Besides, you're coming back to work so things will get back to normal."

Peter decided to let it go for now. He was going back to work and he planned on keeping a close eye on Neal.

"Think Elizabeth would like this pie?" Neal nodded his head, as he stuffed the last crumbs into his mouth. "Here, finish mine." Peter pushed his half eaten piece towards the younger man. "I'll go order a pie for tonight."

As he waited in line, Peter watched his friend from afar. Neal was a work in progress but Peter always liked a challenge and he wasn't about to give up now, not on someone he cared about.


	13. Chapter 13

Monday morning Neal arrived ten minutes early at the Burke's residence and it took five minutes of ringing the bell until someone finally opened the door.

"Sorry Neal." Elizabeth smiled wearily. "We're running late and I'm trying to make sure Peter has everything he needs."

"Where's Peter?" Neal asked, as he entered the house.

"Elizabeth!"

"There is he" Neal muttered as he glanced towards the second floor.

"Neal, please go see what he wants" Elizabeth said as she continued checking things off her list.

"Peter, I'm coming up" Neal announced two steps from the top. "Better be decent" he added as he neared the Burke's bedroom.

"Close enough" Neal remarked as he watched Peter limp from the bathroom to the closet looking for something, clad only in his dress pants. Neal grimaced when he saw the jagged scars running just above the belt.

"Stop staring at the scars and help me find my new t-shirts." Neal nodded as he started rummaging through the closet finally coming across a package of t-shirts on the floor. Neal quickly ripped the package open and tossed one to Peter.

"Thanks. Now get out so I can finish getting ready."

Neal went downstairs and found Elizabeth in the kitchen.

"Need any help?" he asked as she frantically placed things in a backpack. "Neal, he doesn't like these, but make sure he has three protein shakes during the day. Plus eight glasses of water and no coffee."

"Hey, I need my coffee" Peter said as he walked into the kitchen. "The doctor said I could have a cup a day."

"Yeah, and do you remember what that espresso did to your stomach?"

"Too much information" Peter barked, pointing at an amused Neal.

"Fine!" Elizabeth said, hands on her hips. "When your knee locks while you're sitting on…"

"I'm leaving" Neal mumbled as he ran out of the kitchen and to the relative safety of the living room. Peter followed a few minutes later, looking rather embarrassed.

"No coffee for you" Neal said, ignoring the glare from his partner.

"Shut up and help me." Peter held up one sock. Neal nodded and kneeled on the floor, quickly putting the sock on Peter's foot.

"Nervous?" Neal asked, sensing the tension in his friend.

"A little bit" Peter quietly admitted. "It's been over three months. What if I lost something?"

"You didn't" Neal assured him as he stood. "You can still yell with the best of them" he spit out as he quickly got out of the way when Peter tried to smack him.

"Neal, I forgot the extra clothing. Please go upstairs and grab the work out bag at the foot of the bed."

"I don't need extra clothes." Peter stood, glaring at his wife.

"If you take a nap you don't want to wrinkle your good clothes do you?"

"I don't need a nap. I'm not two years old."

"Then stop acting like one" Elizabeth quickly countered. "You know you've been napping every day since you've been out of the hospital. Neal please go get it."

"Out of boredom…Neal stop!" Neal looked from one to the other and then at the dog, who was sleeping soundly on the floor and no help at all.

"Honey, take it with you. If you don't need it fine but you have it just in case." Elizabeth neared her husband and soothingly kissed his check.

He took a deep breath. "Fine, I'll take them. Neal, grab my teddy bear while you're up there" Peter spit out disgustedly before planting himself on the sofa. Neal looked at Elizabeth and then headed upstairs, happy to be out of the line of fire.

Ten minutes later they were on the road. Neal glanced at his sullen partner, sitting in the passenger seat. "This must be what it feels like taking your child to their first day of school."

"Caffrey shut up and drive." Neal chuckled softly as he turned the radio on, quickly finding the sports talk show he knew Peter liked.

"Neal, where's Peter?" Neal glanced up to see Diana approach him. "Sleeping" Neal answered, pointing to the seemingly empty office. "When he almost took a nose dive during lunch, I convinced him a nap might do him good. I said I would wake him in fifteen minutes."

"When was that?" Diana asked. "Is he sleeping on the floor?"

"No. If you place the cot just right, you can only see him if you walk right up to the window." Neal glanced at his watch. "He's been sleeping for nearly two hours."

"He's going to kill you" Diana said.

"Maybe." Neal shrugged. "I need to wake him soon to take his medication."

"Neal, how are you doing?"

"Fine" he replied, his standard answer these days.

"Are you sleeping any better?" Diana pulled up a chair and sat down next to him. You only had to look at Neal to know he wasn't.

"I really wish you hadn't witnessed that" Neal said, wishing he could also forget. He had gone over to Diana's to help her girlfriend with an art project and had fallen asleep on the sofa, only to scare them both when he woke up screaming.

"But I did" Diana said. "Are you sleeping any better?" she asked again.

He shrugged. "I sleep great until I wake up" he admitted. "One night its Kate's plane engulfed in flames, the next I see Peter lying on the ground bleeding to death and other nights, I'm a child and crying myself to sleep. Don't ask" he spit out before she could.

"Does Peter know the extent of your issues?"

"No and please don't tell him. He needs to focus on his health and not worry about me."

"He looks pretty good" Diana remarked. "Maybe ten pounds lighter but all things considering, he's a lucky man." She stood. "Tell him what's going on or I will." Neal watched her walk away, unfazed by her threat. If Peter didn't know already he would soon Neal figured so he would put it off as long as possible. Glancing at his watch again, Neal walked over to Peter's office and quietly entered. Peter looked peaceful and he hated to wake him but he knew his partner was on a strict medicine regimen.

"Hey! Peter." Neal knelt next to the cot and gently shook his friend. "Too tired" Peter said loudly and tried to shake Neal's hand off of him.

"Peter, keep your voice down. You're at work, remember?" Peter stared up at him, eyes half-mast until realization hit and his eyes widen.

"How long have I been asleep?" he demanded as Neal helped him sit up.

"About two hours" Neal answered, "and don't tell me I should have woke you. It was a busy morning and you needed the rest." Peter sat with his head lowered, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. "I know" he admitted, "and I'm not angry. How's the case going?" He took the pills Neal offered and swallowed each one with a swig of water. He frowned when Neal handed him the protein shake but took a small sip without complaining.

"Haven't found anything" Neal answered. "Do you want to go home or continue looking at files?" Neal asked.

"Let's look some over" Peter replied as he slowly moved from the cot to his desk and waited for Neal to bring the files in.

"Don't even suggest I change clothes" Peter muttered when Neal walked back into his office.

"I wasn't going to" Neal remarked, as he sat down and started spreading files over the desk. "As far as I'm concerned, I never saw you asleep today."

Peter looked at him, as a smile spread across his face. "Knew I could count on you" he said before picking up the first file.


	14. Chapter 14

"Neal!" Peter raced after the younger man and into June's house. "Neal, what is your problem? Did you think I'd do nothing after you almost drove us into the Hudson River?" Peter held his hand out, offering the bottle of pills to Neal. "They'll help you sleep better, that's it." Peter quietly pleaded as Neal silently stared at the offered medicine. "Neal you can't function on so little sleep. Please take them."

Neal's dull blue eyes briefly made contact with Peter before slowly taking the bottle from the agent's hand. He held it up cautiously and Peter noticed the slight shaking of his hand. "I don't need these" Neal calmly said before viciously tossing the bottle against the wall, causing the contents to spill out. "I don't need them" Neal repeated as he glared at Peter. "I'm fine, really I am."

"No you're not." They both turned, startled to see June standing so near. "Neal, I hear you at night…"

"June, please…no" Neal pleaded, backing away like a cornered animal. His eyes wildly darted from Peter to June, and Peter knew he was planning his escape. "Neal, calm down. We both want what's best for you." Peter took a step towards his friend, hands held out. "Stay away" Neal said calmly, so calmly it unnerved Peter and he instinctively took a step closer. "Neal…" He reached for the younger man, but Neal bolted and was out the door before Peter could stop him.

"Peter, let him go" June said.

"The snow is coming down pretty hard" Peter commented as he stared out the door. "That idiot is going to freeze to death."

"Peter, we need to talk." June led him over to the sofa. "Neal told me a little about his past and I'm going to tell you…and then what just happened might make more sense to you."

It only took June a few minutes to relay what she knew of Neal's past and silently she watched the agent digest the news. Sighing, Peter tried to rub the tension from his neck.

"He's right about one thing" Peter said breaking the silence, "I won't let him use the past as an excuse."

"But Peter…"

"June, wait." Peter held his hand up. "Nothing you told me really shocked me. Neal told me he didn't graduate high school so I already assumed he was on the streets as a teenager. As for the rest…I don't know." Peter absently rubbed his aching knee as he tried to gather his thoughts. "I've always known Neal Caffrey was a fake personal, from the clothes he wears to that smile plastered on his face." Peter chuckled as he glanced away from the older woman's stare. "I've seen glimpses of the real Neal but every time I slice through one layer another one takes its place. Sometimes I wonder if there's even a point…"

"Peter you can't give up on him" June said as she leaned over and took Peter's hand. "He's been on his own his whole life. That's something you and I can't imagine. Please don't give up on him."

"No." Peter shook his head as he gently squeezed the older woman's hand. "I care too much about him to give up. Did he tell you I offered him a real job?" June shook her head no.

"Over a month ago I brought it up and he hasn't said a word. I asked him once if he was considering it and he said he didn't want to talk about it. June, I'm trying to give him a future and he's fighting me the whole way." Peter shrugged. "Not sure what else I can do" he added quietly.

June smiled as she sat back against the sofa. "He's a hard one to figure out. Peter he didn't grow up with the unconditional love of parents and I think he has a hard time accepting that anyone would care about him."

Peter took a deep breath. "You sound like you've known a few Neal Caffreys in your life."

June smiled sadly. "We all have our past. If I were younger I'd watch over him but I'm not a young woman and he'll need you and Elizabeth to keep an eye on him."

"We'll do our best" Peter said as he stood. "I need to go make some phone calls to track our wayward friend."

June nodded as she also stood. "I need to get something upstairs. Please don't leave before I come back."

Fifteen minutes later Peter was pacing the long hallway as he waited for June to return.

"Did you find him?" June asked as she descended the steps.

"Why are you carrying a suitcase?" Peter asked as he grabbed it from her. "I love this house" June answered, as she glanced around. "But it's so big, it has a tendency to engulf you and that's the last thing Neal needs right now."

Peter eyed her wearily. "Are you kicking him out?"

"Of course not" June replied with a wave of her arm. "But I think you offer what he needs right now. I think he should stay with you for a couple of days."

Peter wasn't so sure about that but he didn't think June would take no for an answer and he knew Elizabeth wouldn't mind. "Well, he's already walked two miles so I better go get him. Wish me luck" Peter added as he opened the door.

"Good luck" June whispered once the agent was gone.

It was the first snow of the season and the streets were mostly deserted as Peter slowly drove towards his partner, keeping in close contact with Jones.

"I see him" Peter said as he hung up the phone, keeping his eyes on the lone figure walking ahead. Peter slowed the car and rolled the window down.

"Neal, get in the car." The younger man gave no indication that he had heard anything, just kept his snow covered head down and continued to trudge ahead.

"Neal!" Peter honked the horn, as he swore softly to himself. Of course, nothing with Neal was easy.

Peter drove ahead and then pulled over, getting out as fast as he could. Neal stopped walking about two feet away and looked up.

"You look like a drowned rat" Peter remarked, smiling warmly at the younger man. "Neal, get in the car before you freeze to death." To his credit, or maybe because he was so cold, Neal got in without putting up a fight.

"Here, wrap yourself in this." Peter took his jacket off and tossed it to Neal before getting in the car and turning the heat up. Peter watched the younger man seated beside him as he shook mightily despite the heat and the warm jacket wrapped around him.

Peter pulled away, knowing the best thing was to get Neal home and out of the wet clothes. Neal remained quiet until he realized Peter wasn't heading towards June's house.

"Where are we going?" Neal quietly asked.

"For the next few days mi casa is su casa" Peter replied casually, waiting for Neal's reaction. Neal's silence only worried Peter more and he silently went over his lecture, hoping somehow he would get through to his friend.


	15. Chapter 15

Peter opened the front door and motioned for Neal to go in. He followed, and noticed the only light in the house was upstairs.

"Elizabeth is probably reading in bed. I'm going up to talk to her and get you a towel." He dropped the suitcase on the floor. "Change and wait for me in the kitchen." By the time Peter returned, Neal was seated at the table, with his chin resting on his folded hands. He didn't move when the agent entered.

"Neal, take this and dry your hair." In slow motion the younger man grabbed the towel and ran it through his hair before tossing it aside, leaving his hair no dryer than before. Peter knew the action was meant to anger him and it did, so he walked a few feet away and counted to ten, willing himself to remain calm.

"Neal, tell me something" Peter began, calmly. "I learned you were thinking about your future from Mozzie. I learned you were having sleep issues from Diana and I learned about your past from June. Do you see a pattern forming? Neal I thought you trusted me yet you can't come to me with your problems, why is that?"

"Because you wouldn't understand" Neal quietly answered. "Peter, everything with you is black and white…you'd tell me to cowboy up, take responsibility for my actions, or any other cliché that would come to mind. Why do you think I won't tell anyone where I hid everything?"

Peter shrugged.

"Come on Peter, you know everything about me. Tell me why I won't give up everything I've stolen?" Neal stood angrily, clearly agitated. "Tell me" he demanded, with a slight hitch in his voice.

"I don't know Neal. You tell me." Peter neared him and tried to lay a hand on the younger man's shoulder but Neal quickly backed away. "Because as much as I try I can't forget the little boy who sneaked out at night and rummaged through garbage looking for food" Neal said, quickly turning away from Peter's gaze.

"Someday, after I screw everything up it's all I'll have left. Peter, I'll never be that little boy again. I can't…" Neal's voice cracked and he leaned heavily against the fridge.

Peter again tried to approach him. "Neal, please come sit down." He wrapped his arm around Neal's shoulder and guided the younger man back to the table.

Peter paced. It was a rather abbreviated version as he walked one step, stopped, glanced at Neal as he rubbed his neck and then took another step. He was curious, he wanted to know more about Neal's past but he wasn't sure how much he could truly believe and he knew there was nothing he could do to change what happened. He wanted to help Neal and he was trying but it took two for this work and Neal wasn't doing his part.

He watched Neal and he knew the anguish on the younger man's face was real, the hands held tightly to his face were a desperate attempt to keep hi s composure but he couldn't stop the tears that rolled slowly down his cheeks. Peter grabbed some tissue and held it out.

"Thanks" Neal mumbled as he wiped his face. "I know how much you hate crying." Neal sniffled as he closed his eyes, a last ditch attempt to stop the tears.

"I'd be more worried if you had a fake smile plastered on your face" Peter said as he pulled over a chair and sat down, close to his partner. He reached over and placed a hand on Neal's shoulder and waited, for the tension to ease in the younger man and for him to calm down enough to be able to carry a conversation without breaking down completely. They sat in a comfortable silence for nearly twenty minutes until Neal glanced at Peter with a weary smile. "Sorry" he whispered in a stronger voice.

"It's ok." Peter squeezed Neal's shoulder gently before removing his hand. "Neal, I'm not worried about your stash, not right now." Peter chuckled at the incredulous look Neal gave him. "Maybe someday" Peter continued, "we can figure out a way to return everything to its rightful place."

"Maybe" Neal agreed with a simple word that didn't mean much but Peter considered it a small victory.

"Neal, I need you to be honest with yourself and with me." Peter paused and realized how thirsty he was. "Want something to drink?" he asked as he stood. This conversation might go better with beer but Peter nixed that idea and grabbed two bottles of water out of the fridge, placing one in front of Neal.

"Neal, I have given you an opportunity for a future, why are you so unwilling to sign the papers?" Peter watched his friend take a small sip of water and a chocolate chip cookie from a plate in the middle of the table.

"Peter, he was my friend" Neal said, his voice soft.

"Who was?" Peter asked, clearly confused.

"The man who shot you" Neal answered, rather calmly. "Shortly, after I got to New York he found me hiding in an alley. I was hungry and I was cold and I had no idea what to do next." Neal glanced at the forgotten cookie in his hand and took a bite, chewing slowly.

"Neal, did he help you?" Peter anxiously asked, surprised by his partner's revelation.

"Yeah" Neal answered, head nodding. "He showed me how to survive, keep warm and avoid the cops." Neal glanced at Peter but the agent's face remained passive. "When I was ready I left and we were fine. Peter I have no idea why he wanted to kill me."

"You can ask him." Peter suggested. "I can set up a meeting and we can go together."

"I'm not sure I want to know" Neal commented. "Peter, what if he's not the only one? What if others find me and you try to protect me again and...?"

"Neal, I'm not worried. And I truly believe next time you'll come to me first." Peter wasn't so sure about that but he hoped Neal had learned his lesson about friends showing up out of the blue, plus he planned to be more vigilant in keeping an eye on his partner. Peter walked out and returned with the job application that he placed before Neal.

"Neal, please sign this. We'll get it mailed and we'll make it official." Peter produced a pen and waved it in front of his friend.

"What if I change my mind?" Neal asked.

"If you find something else, as long as it's _**legal**_" Peter emphasized, "I will support you." Peter waved the pen again and this time, Neal took it and officially signed the job application.

"Thank you" Peter said as he gathered the papers and put them to the side. He watched as Neal tried to drink some water but his lip was quivering and he quickly put the bottle down.

"Neal, what is it?" This time Peter was completely baffled. The younger man just shook his head as he bit down on his lower lip.

"Neal, I can't help you if you won't tell me what's wrong." Peter sighed as Neal turned away, closed mouth once again.

"OK Neal." Peter stood and placed his hand on the younger man's head, rubbing gently. "It's late and I'm tired. I'll get a pillow and some blankets for you." When he returned Neal was already sitting on the sofa and he took the offered bedding from the agent.

Peter waited for him to settle down before turning the lights off.

"Goodnight Neal" Peter said but he wasn't surprised when the younger man remained silent. At the staircase Peter stopped and listened to the unmistakable muffled sobs coming from his friend. Peter glanced upstairs to the safety of this wife and dog and then back at the sofa, where his friend laid, raging a battle with his inner demons and at the moment, undoubtedly losing.

Without hesitation Peter neared the sofa, and pulled a chair closer. He silently sat and placed a hand on Neal's shoulder, shocked at how much the younger man was shaking, not shocked when Neal pulled away from the hand, trying to burrow into the back of the sofa.

"Neal, I'm here when you're ready to talk." Peter arranged the blankets tighter around Neal and gently rubbed his head, and waited. It wasn't long before Neal fell into an exhausted sleep, rolling around until he was lying on his back with his face towards Peter, finally peaceful and nightmare free.

Peter watched him for another hour, and when he was convinced Neal wouldn't awaken, he walked upstairs.


	16. Chapter 16

"It's about time you woke up" Peter remarked as he closed the front door and took the leash off the dog. Neal was seated on the sofa pretending to watch TV.

"Why didn't we go to work today?" Neal asked, as he turned his attention to the dog, who was now sitting next to him on the sofa.

"Unless something comes up, we're both off for the next few days."

"Why?" Neal asked suspiciously, eyeing his partner. He stopped petting Satch, who whined his complaints at the lack of attention.

"Because you need a few days off" Peter answered matter-of-factly "and I…"

"Need to babysit me" Neal interrupted.

Peter shrugged. "Look at it however you want. Besides Elizabeth has a project for us to do." Neal looked up questioningly but didn't ask so Peter continued. "She wants to turn the upstairs office into a second bedroom so her nieces can stay over and I figured you can help me." Neal shrugged as Peter sat down, eyes on the younger man.

"Neal, I'm sure Elizabeth wouldn't mind if you wanted to keep some clothes here." Peter keenly watched the younger man, observing his reaction. Neal looked away, clearly touched and embarrassed by Peter's words.

"Hey!" Peter reached over and tapped Neal's leg. "I can't predict the future but I can promise you if you stick around you'll never be alone and you'll never go hungry." Peter chuckled, trying in vain to disperse the tension but Neal couldn't meet his gaze and Peter didn't want a repeat of the previous evening.

"Neal, I need to go out for a bit." Peter stood. "There are clean towels in the bathroom if you want to take a shower and make yourself breakfast. Just clean up any mess. " Peter added sternly, hoping for any kind of reaction from his partner but Neal continued to stare off in space.

"Be ready to leave when I get back" Peter said as he opened the front door.

Peter returned to find Neal sitting in the exact same spot, though he had managed to change clothes.

"Did you eat?" Neal nodded yes.

"OK." Peter tossed the bag he was holding on to the sofa. "I guessed at your size so hopefully everything fits." Neal looked up at Peter and then slowly opened the bag, pulling out a couple of t-shirts and shorts.

"I assumed you don't have those in your wardrobe" Peter said, trying not to laugh at Neal's confused look. "We can change at the gym. Let's go before the lunch crowd gets there."

Twenty minutes later, Peter pulled into a parking lot and practically had to drag Neal out of the car.

"I don't like basketball" Neal muttered as he followed the agent inside. Once changed, the two men found themselves alone on the court.

"Have you ever played?" Peter asked as he practiced dribbling the ball. "I can't run yet" Peter said glancing at the brace on his knee, "but we can practice shooting today."

"Wonderful" Neal said cheerfully, grinning at the look Peter made. Peter chose to ignore the sarcasm and began explaining the proper way to shoot the basketball. Sighing louder, Neal paid attention when he realized that Peter was serious about teaching him the finer points of the game. They started shooting and though the first few shots Neal attempted banged off the rim, he was a natural athlete and it didn't take long before he started making baskets. He also discovered something unexpected…Peter was cheering loudly when the ball went in and offering encouragement when it didn't…and Neal found himself responding in turn, smiling at his friend's enthusiasm and listening intently to Peter's words.

Almost an hour passed and both men needed a break.

"How's the knee?" Neal asked when he spied Peter rubbing it.

"A little sore" Peter admitted, before taking a drink of water.

"Ready?" Peter asked, after a ten minute break. "We're going to play a game called HORSE" Peter said as Neal followed him back on the court. Quickly he explained the rules, pleased that Neal was paying attention and assuming he wasn't faking, he seemed to be enjoying himself.

"That's a stupid name" Neal commented as he missed the shot Peter had just made. "Why isn't it called cat or dog?" Neal asked, clearly trying to agitate his partner. "How about elephant?" Neal called out just as Peter started to shoot. The ball didn't even hit the backboard, and Peter glanced at his partner, feigning annoyance. "Two can play at this game" Peter whispered before yelling out nonsense, causing Neal to miss. This went on and neither man was able to make a basket, and finally they gave up, laughing too hard to continue.

"Peter." Neal said as he watched his friend wipe the tears from his eyes. "Can I ask you something?" he requested so seriously that it immediately sobered up Peter.

"Neal, what is it?" Both men were seated on the floor, the basketball off to the side, suddenly forgotten.

"If I do something stupid" Neal began, eyes lowered, hands nervously tying the shoe lace on his sneaker, "and I end up in jail again, will you come visit me?" Only after he got the question out, did Neal have the courage to look Peter in the eyes. It was the last thing Peter was expecting and only years of practice enabled him to keep his face neutral as he eyed his partner.

"Neal, are you planning on doing something stupid?" he asked evenly, grateful when the younger man shook his head no.

"It's just a what if" Neal explained, "since we both know how impulsive I can be. I just can't imagine being in there and having no one care…" Neal shrugged defensively.

Peter took a deep breath stalling for time as he gathered his thoughts. Neal Caffrey was an enigma and every time Peter thought he had him figured out, Neal would throw him another curve ball…though this time Peter had no intention of striking out.

"Neal, I will do all I can to keep you out of jail but…" Peter quickly added before Neal could protest, "If you do something I can't fix then yes, I will visit you in jail. Keep something else in mind." Peter smiled broadly. "I will visit you every day and you will have to listen to the same lecture day after day. Is anything worth that?" Neal couldn't keep the look of horror off his face at that thought, an exaggerated expression that caused Peter to snort out loud.

"Neal, you need to think twice or maybe three times before you do something you know is wrong. Plus you can always call me, you know that, right?"

"Yeah" Neal quietly said as he leaned against the wall. "Are you hungry?"

Peter nodded. "Let's grab some lunch and go see about our project."

Neal stood first and hauled Peter to his feet.

"Are you sure you're going to be ready to play?" Neal asked watching Peter's noticeable limp.

"Don't worry about me" Peter remarked. "I wouldn't miss this game for anything."

It was nearly midnight when Peter quietly settled into bed, trying not to wake his wife who reached for the table lamp and turned it on.

"Sorry El" Peter said, smiling sheepishly.

"I was up" Elizabeth whispered as she faced her husband. "Neal said something while we were cleaning up after dinner and I couldn't let it go. Did you tell him that room was for my nieces?"

Peter shrugged, eyes darting around. "Yeah, sort of" he admitted, rolling his eyes when Elizabeth started laughing.

"Don't you think they should be out of diapers before they stay over?" she questioned, as Peter looked away. "Why didn't you just tell Neal the room was for him? Peter we talked about it and after what June said, we decided Neal needed an anchor here even if he never uses it."

Peter sighed. "El, he's a grown man even if he doesn't act like it. I wasn't sure how to bring up the subject…I figured this was the best way. Besides" Peter added forlornly, "I'm sure he saw right through my lie and since he didn't call me on it, he's also embarrassed by the idea."

"You could be right." Elizabeth turned the light off and then snuggled close to her husband.

"Is he sleeping soundly?"

"He is" Peter answered.

"How do you think he would feel knowing you spent two hours watching him sleep?"

"Not a clue" Peter admitted. "Neal didn't come with an instruction manual so I'm doing what I think is best. Besides, the most important thing is that he gets uninterrupted sleep and so far, so good."

"Peter, you're a good friend to him" Elizabeth whispered as she kissed him goodnight.


	17. Chapter 17

Peter put his paint roller down and rubbed his brow, and then glanced over his shoulder at Neal, who was too busy to notice he was being watched. Peter had let Neal decide how they would remodel the office and Neal, being who he was, decided that the room needed a complete overhaul including redoing the walls and floor. Elizabeth was excited about the idea so Peter had no choice but to go along with the plan.

That being said, they were where they were…three days into the project and the room was a mess. And Peter had to go back to work. An early morning phone call from Hughes made it quite clear that Peter was to be back the next day because there was too much paperwork and Hughes wasn't willing to do it or dole it out to someone unable to handle it. He did consent to Peter deciding what was best for Neal and Peter already knew…now he needed Neal to go along with it.

The three days had done wonders for Neal, he was sleeping through the night and eating like a pig, and Peter hadn't recalled one fake smile the whole time. They would get up early, go to the gym for an hour or two and then work on the room. And they would talk, a lot, about their childhood and Peter truly believed Neal was being honest with him. Peter knew Neal longed for what he didn't have but he seemed to have made peace with his past and he was content with the present.

Neither had to worry about bad guys or cons and Peter didn't want that to end yet, as least not for Neal.

"I can hear you thinking" Neal said as he turned to face the agent. "Peter, is something wrong?"

"I talked to Hughes this morning" Peter replied, "and I have to go back to work tomorrow." Peter saw the disappointment flash across the younger man's face, but it quickly disappeared, replaced by a frown as he glanced around the room.

"What about this?" Neal asked. "We can't leave it like this or Elizabeth will kill us."

"Yeah." Peter nodded in agreement, sighing loudly, his fingers twisted tightly in a ball. "Neal, you don't need to go back yet. Would you finish the room for me?"

"Is that ok with Hughes?"

Peter nodded. "He's ok with it and so am I."

"But what if you need me?"

"I'll let you know immediately and then we can finish after the case is done. Neal, what do you think?"

Neal dipped his roller into the paint pan. "I'm fine with it" he said as he turned his back to Peter. "Can I ask Mozzie to help me?"

"Sure" Peter answered so quickly that Neal spun and eyed his partner suspiciously. "Peter, are you sick?"

Peter chuckled. "Neal, I trust you and Mozzie is your friend. If he wants to help, I'm fine with it. I'm hungry." Peter said suddenly. "Let's go figure out something for lunch."

Peter turned the corner and nearly jumped out of his skin.

"Mozzie, what the hell?" he spit out, once he found his voice. "If you need to talk to me… call, like a normal person." Peter started walking, knowing the little man was following.

Once they reached the car Peter got in, not surprised when his shadow opened the passenger door and sat down.

"Mozzie is something wrong? When I talked to Neal earlier he said the two of you were finishing up for the day."

"And we did" Mozzie remarked. "And now I'm here."

Peter shook his head and took a calming breath. "And what do I owe the pleasure of your company?"

"It was a nice touch giving Neal his own room in your house."

"Did Neal tell you that?" Peter asked cautiously.

"He did" Mozzie replied.

"And how does he feel about it?" Peter questioned, not surprised that Neal saw through his lie.

"He seems fine" Mozzie muttered.

"And that worries you?" Peter tried not to laugh at the look on Mozzie's face.

"Shouldn't it?" Mozzie countered, fidgeting under the agent's stare. "You and Mrs. Suit are providing a room for a grown man in your home. Does that sound normal to you? I think not" Mozzie added emphatically.

Peter started laughing as he stared at Mozzie in disbelief. "OK" he admitted, somewhat chastised, "if you put it that way, yes it sounds strange, but I assure you Neal is not moving in with us…not now, not ever."

"Color me confused" Mozzie retorted, staring blandly at Peter. "Does Neal know he's not moving in with you?"

Peter sighed, as he turned his head, trying hard not to break out in another laughing fit. He sniffled, took a deep breath as he figured out the best way to explain this.

"Mozzie, we both know the kind of childhood Neal had. He never had a place he could call home…"

"Many of us don't" Mozzie interrupted, solemnly. Peter stared at him, and not for the first time, wondered about this strange man's background.

"Sorry Moz" Peter quietly said. "I can't save everyone and I have my hands full with Neal right now."

Mozzie shrugged. "I have more homes than you can imagine" he retorted. "Back to the subject, please."

"Elizabeth and I thought if Neal had a place he could come back to, no matter how many years had past or the distance between us, it might make him feel safer, able to function better in the real world."

"Like Dorothy said, there's no place like home" Mozzie spit out, quietly.

"The Wizard of Oz" Peter quickly countered.

"And you took this upon yourself. Can I ask why?"

Peter smiled warmly, as he leaned back against the seat, eyes straight ahead. "Because he's my friend and I do care about him. But if I'm truly honest, I owe him my life even if he doesn't know it."

"I'm intrigued" Mozzie said as he sat up straight. "Care to share or do I have to guess?"

Peter studied the man next to him. For the most part he didn't trust him, but he wanted Mozzie to understand his connection to Neal and how the younger man had unwittingly put Peter's life back on track.

"Mozzie I'd prefer you keep what I tell you to yourself, ok?" Mozzie silently nodded his head.

"It was shortly after 9/11 when we first became aware of an arrogant, brash kid who had supposedly forged millions of dollars worth of bonds. As you can imagine it was a surreal time so the case was given as much attention as we could afford too under the circumstances."

"Did you get Neal's case?" Mozzie asked.

Peter shook his head no. "I was benched, assigned to desk duty…I had trouble moving beyond that day…many of us did." Peter took a deep breath and tried to focus on the now as he wearily rubbed his eyes with both hands.

"Peter?" There was a sympathetic tone in Mozzie's voice that startled Peter and he glanced sideways. "I'm ok" he said, unconvincingly.

"In twelve months Neal's case was given to four agents and Neal got the better of each one of them. I spent that year trying to save my marriage and at times, my sanity. I wanted out of New York and Elizabeth insisted we stay and we did nothing but fight…it wasn't her fault. I lost a lot of friends that day and I had trouble coping and she didn't know how to help me." Lost in his thoughts, Peter didn't seem to notice Mozzie fidgeting nervously next to him, until Mozzie started coughing, bringing Peter back to the present.

"Suit, you don't need to tell me the rest" Mozzie said quietly, unnerved by the agent's trip down memory lane.

"Please Moz, let me finish" Peter pleaded in a quiet voice. "During that year I spent a lot of time studying Neal's case and I started noticing patterns in his crimes."

"So you asked for the case?" Mozzie put forth but Peter shook his head no.

"No, I resigned and Hughes tried to talk me out of it. He made a deal with me. If I could catch Neal, he would seek a transfer for me to any city I preferred. And I came close the first time" Peter boasted, "and Neal knew it and we started a game of cat and mouse that lasted nearly three years." Peter paused, taking a deep breath. "For me, the chase was more important than actually catching Neal. I was able to heal during that time and by the time I did catch Neal, my life and my marriage were both stable."

"So Neal helped you and you had no problem putting him in jail. Doesn't seem fair, does it?"

"Hey, don't change history. Neal was no choir boy and we both know it. He got what he deserved and he did his time. And now I want to help him turn his life around."

"And where does that leave me?" Mozzie quietly asked.

"Mozzie, you're his friend. We both know Neal isn't going to change and I don't want him to. His mind and his unique talents make him an asset for my team. I think if we work together, we can keep him on the straight and narrow. What do you think?"

I'm in" Mozzie answered and they both turned silent. Peter expected Mozzie to leave but the little man sat there, studying something through the windshield.

"Anything else?" Peter asked. "Do you want me to drop you off somewhere?" What Peter wanted was to get rid of his passenger and go home, eat dinner and relax in front of the TV.

"Do you want to know why I'm here?" Mozzie asked.

"Not really" Peter answered harshly and immediately regretted it. "I'm sorry. Thinking about that day just makes me want to go home and see my wife. Why did you want to see me today?"

"To say thank you" Mozzie replied and that was the last thing Peter expected to hear.

"For…what?" Peter asked, when Mozzie didn't elaborate.

"For getting through to Neal" Mozzie answered as he opened the passenger door and walked away, leaving a befuddled Peter behind. Peter stared after him for a few minutes before starting the car and heading home.


	18. Chapter 18

**NOTE: I do appreciate all the reviews. This one is almost done (21 chapters) and already written so I will finish posting it soon. Also have a sequel in the works but that's for the next WC hiatus. **

**

* * *

**

Neal sat on the floor, leaned against the wall and scrutinized the finished bedroom. It was void of furniture but Elizabeth, after hours of searching through magazines and online had found a set she liked and promptly ordered it.

The previous evening Elizabeth had gushed about the job Neal had done and Peter had quietly watched the younger man, trying to gage Neal's reaction. He was proud and he enjoyed remodeling but he was sad too, and a little anxious about getting back to his real job and leaving the sanctity of the Burke's home. He had known from the beginning what Peter was doing yet he couldn't find one reason to object about what the agent was doing for him. He felt safe and secure, perfectly normal reactions for a child but not for an adult and though the situation was odd and Mozzie felt the need to point it out, neither Elizabeth nor Peter acted like anything out of the ordinary was taking place.

"Hey." Neal looked up, startled to see Peter standing there.

"What are you doing here?" Neal asked as the agent sat down next to him.

"I could hear you brooding all the way from the bureau" Peter admitted, "and I left early to see how you were doing. How are you doing?"

"I don't know" Neal answered truthfully. "Peter I don't know how to thank you for the last few weeks…no one has ever done anything like this for me."

"I think you've been doing all the work" Peter said, trying to lighten the moment. But it only had the opposite effect as Neal angrily stood and walked away from his friend.

"Neal, what's wrong?" Peter slowly stood.

Neal sighed, as he calmed himself. He wasn't angry with Peter but with himself and his inability to handle the generosity that the Burkes had bestowed upon him.

"Peter, I can't hide here forever."

"I don't expect you to" Peter quietly said. "I wouldn't call it hiding either." Peter approached the younger man and placed a gentle hand on Neal's shoulder. "Neal, after everything that has happened this past year, you needed time to heal and June's a smart woman."

Neal glanced at him, clearly confused as Peter continued. "That night when I brought you back here, it was June who suggested it and said we could offer what you needed the most. And she was right. But now you have to be honest with yourself and with me."

"About what?" Neal asked as he shrugged off the hand on his shoulder.

"Do you want to go back to June's?" Peter didn't miss the hesitation before Neal nodded yes.

"OK." Peter smiled, trying to ignore the tension radiating from his partner. "And what about work?" Peter asked next. "Are you ready to go back to work?"

"Yes" Neal answered with a bit more conviction.

"Good" Peter said, "Because we miss having you around" he added sincerely. "Lastly, if the nightmares come back you need to tell me ok?"

"Why?" Neal asked grinning, "are you going to have me remodel another room?"

Peter shook his head, chuckling. "I think we're beyond that pretense, don't you? Neal, you have a room here if you need it, you just have to ask."

Neal turned away, as his eyes filled with tears. He couldn't remember a time when he had so much trouble keeping his emotions at bay. As a child, the tears only came at night, silently muffled in his pillow but as an adult, he never cried, not even when Kate died,

"Neal, are you ok?"

Neal shook his head as he walked over to the window, staring out at the snow covered street. Another gloomy winter day and it was already turning dark. Neal had always hated winter as a child. Most kids loved the snow and the prospect of playing outside but Neal knew he'd not only be hungry but he would be cold too. Neal shivered slightly as he felt Peter's eyes bore a hole in him.

"Neal, I'm going to pick up Elizabeth at the train station. We'll pick up dinner on the way back." Neal nodded his acknowledgement as he continued staring out the window, making no movement to wipe the tears that rolled down his cheeks. Only after Peter was gone did Neal swipe at his face before sliding down the wall, hugging himself fiercely as he struggled to keep the mounting tears from escaping. Giving up, he buried his face against his knees and cried freely.

* * *

Neal was seated in the same position when he heard footsteps coming towards him. He looked up to see Elizabeth enter the room, concern clearly etched on her face. Neal smiled weakly at her, though he knew his eyes betrayed him.

"I see Peter sent in the cavalry" Neal said as Elizabeth approached him and sat down.

"He's worried about you" Elizabeth said as she leaned against the wall, mirroring his position. "He knows you're upset but he doesn't know why or how to help you. Will you talk to me?"

Neal shrugged, as he closed his eyes, leaning towards Elizabeth when she put her arm around him.

"You two would make great parents" Neal said as he sat up straighter. "Elizabeth, as irrational as it sounds part of me doesn't want to leave. It's so normal here and I've never had normal before. Does that make sense?"

"It makes perfect sense" Elizabeth said as she cupped Neal's face, gently forcing him to look at her. "Neal, there's a little boy in you who craves things most of us take for granted. Did you ever sit down at a dinner table with your mom and have a conversation?"

"No." Neal muttered as he lowered his gaze. "Most nights she was either working or out drinking and sometimes she would remember to bring food home for me."

"And when she didn't?" Elizabeth asked. "How often did you go to bed hungry?"

"I don't know." Neal stood up gingerly, shaking out his numb legs. "What did you pick up for dinner?"

"Chinese" Elizabeth answered as she stood. "Neal wait." She took his arm to keep him from exiting the room. "There are all types of family and you're never too old to want or need them. And I'm sure Peter has danced around the subject and never come out and say it but you're family, understand?" She watched a myriad of expressions cross his face and then he grinned.

"I know" he simply said. "Let's go eat, I'm hungry."

* * *

"I can't believe you talked me into this" Peter whined as he shivered in the cold, watching Neal as he put the finishing touches on the snowman.

"The hat is perfect" Neal said as he stepped back, eyeing his creation.

"Yeah, he looks kind of like you" Peter remarked, ducking when Neal threw a snowball at him.

"You're going to be sorry." Peter said as he bent over and packed some snow, hitting Neal squarely in the head as the younger man slid to the ground.

"Get him" Peter ordered as the dog romped towards the fallen man.

"Uncle" Neal cried out from under a mound of fur. Peter watched them wrestle for a few minutes before calling the dog off and helping Neal to his feet.

"Neal, tell me again why we're out here freezing our butts off."

"Because I've never made a snowman" Neal answered as he scooped up some more snow.

"OK, now you have. I'm cold and I'm going inside. Stay out as long as you want but I can't promise there will be any hot chocolate left."

"Party pooper" Neal called out before following the agent back into the house.

Two hours later, Peter and Elizabeth were talking softly in the kitchen, occasionally glancing at Neal who was sleeping soundly on the sofa.

"Do you think he'll be ok?" Peter quietly asked.

"I do" Elizabeth assured her husband. "We've done all we can. It's up to Neal to come to terms with his past and move on. Come on, let's go to bed." She stood, and reached a hand out to her husband.

Peter took her hand and quietly they went upstairs.


	19. Chapter 19

Normally a tardy Neal would anger Peter and that was his first reaction but a quick survey of June's staff as he walked through the mansion unnerved him and he anxiously climbed the stairs to Neal's apartment.

"Neal!" Peter pounded on the door and after a few minutes he thought he heard a muttered curse from beyond the locked door. Another few minutes past before a rumpled looking Neal opened the door.

"Sorry Peter" Neal whispered hoarsely as he turned his back and headed towards the bathroom. "I'll be ready soon." Before he reached the bathroom Peter easily caught up and grabbed his arm.

"Neal…"

"They just started" Neal countered, pulling his arm free. "I swear they just started" he added in a pleading voice, hoping that Peter would believe him.

"I know" Peter said, his eyes scrutinizing Neal's face. "Take a shower and I'll call us in late." Neal nodded gratefully and then grabbed some clean clothes before closing the bathroom door.

Peter quickly called the bureau and then picked through Neal's supply of coffee, settling on one of his favorites. He was sitting at the table, savoring the soothing, hot liquid when Neal emerged, showered and neatly dressed.

"Peter, let's go" Neal said as he grabbed his jacket, looking over his shoulder at the agent, who remained seated and seemed to be in no hurry to get to work.

"Peter?" Neal questioned as he approached his partner, searching Peter's face.

"Neal, sit down." Sighing loudly the younger man slowly sat as Peter pushed a mug towards him. "I think we need to talk, don't you?"

"Do I have a choice?" Neal muttered, catching the angry look that quickly flashed across Peter's face, causing Neal to immediately regret his words. "Peter, sorry…I'm just a little on edge. It's been four good weeks; I don't know why they're back."

Peter nodded slightly, as he took a sip of coffee, his eyes never leaving Neal's face. "Do you remember the nightmares?" the agent asked.

"Bits and pieces" Neal answered as he took a deep breath. "I'm sitting in the alley and Glenn…" Neal paused and Peter realizes this is the first time he has spoken the shooter's name. "Glenn finds me" Neal continues quietly, "but instead of helping me, he's pointing a gun at my head…and I think I'm begging for my life and then the gun goes off and I wake up."

Silently the two men finish their coffee until Peter breaks the silence. "Neal how much do you know about Glenn Fisher?"

"Is that his last name?" Neal asked with a weary smile. "Living on the streets you don't ask questions. I always assumed he was like me, out there because he had no choice."

"Not exactly" Peter said with a shrug of his shoulders. "I did some digging around while you were off and Glenn Fisher has a rap sheet that started when he was eight years old. He's been in and out of juvenile detention since he was ten and he was only living on the streets because he got kicked out of college and his father threw him out of the house."

"No way" Neal muttered in disbelief. "Can't be, I would have known…" Neal shook his head. "He said he was one of us and we believed him, he wasn't lying to us."

"Neal, I talked to his father. While he was living on the streets, he was going home and his mother was giving him money to survive and often paid for him to sleep in a hotel room."

"No." Neal lowered his head. "No one would live like we did, if there was another option. Peter, his father was lying to you."

"I don't think so. Neal I was able to get my hands on his sealed files and he was considered mentally unstable by more than one psychiatrist. He killed two family pets and threatened his sister's life."

"Peter, he saved my life" Neal quietly said.

"And then he tried to kill you" Peter countered. "Neal, you said it yourself; you have no idea why he wanted to kill you. Maybe the answer is simply he's insane."

"Peter, can I see him?"

Peter nodded. "It will take a few days, but I can set it up. Are you sure?"

"Yeah" Neal said as he stood. "I need to know why he wanted me dead." Neal took the mugs to the sink and quietly washed them before turning and facing his partner.

"Peter, will you go with me?"

"If that's what you want" Peter answered.

"I do" Neal quietly said as he neared his partner. "Peter, I'm not sure how I'm going to react but I don't want go to alone."

"Ok partner" Peter said a little too cheerfully as he placed a hand on Neal's shoulder, "we'll do this together."

It would be two weeks before Neal got his visit; planned for the day after Glenn Fisher was scheduled to be released from solitary confinement for beating up a fellow inmate. It was two long weeks for Peter, trying to keep his friend and partner from going over the edge; Neal was a walking mass of nerves who couldn't sleep, barely ate and was marginally functional at work. The day of the meeting arrived and Peter watched Neal from his office; the younger man sat at his desk motionless, not even pretending to read the files stacked in front of him. Finally Peter had enough and quietly approached his partner.

"Neal, let's go." The younger man looked up, eyes unfocused. "It's not time" he calmly pointed out.

"We're going for a drive" Peter said, as he practically hauled Neal to his feet. "We'll get something to eat and then go see Fisher."

"I'm not hungry" Neal protested as he followed Peter to the elevator.

"You'll eat anyways" Peter insisted as he pushed the down button, "or you can have one of those wonderful protein shakes" Peter added, ignoring the look Neal gave him.

"Neal, you don't need to do this." They had arrived at the prison ten minutes early and Neal couldn't stop pacing, much to Peter's annoyance.

"Neal." Peter grabbed the younger man by both shoulders and forced him to stand still. "Neal, look at me." In slow motion Neal lifted his head, until he made eye contact with the agent. "You don't need to do this" Peter repeated, gently squeezing Neal's shoulders.

"I have to" Neal insisted. "Peter, I don't think my nightmares will go away until I know the truth."

"And if you don't like what you hear?" Peter asked as he briefly cupped Neal's neck.

"I'll learn to live with it" Neal replied, with a deep sigh.

"OK" Peter said as he glanced at his watch. "Neal, sit down for a few minutes and relax."

Neal rolled his eyes but complied with Peter's request. A few minutes later, a guard opened the door and motioned for them to follow.

"Let's go" Peter said as he put a protective arm around Neal and guided him towards the meeting.


	20. Chapter 20

Neal was quiet as they followed the guard down the long corridor. Peter had glanced his way several times but the younger man kept his focus straight ahead, refusing to make eye contact with the agent. Peter had seen several mug shots of Glenn Fisher from years gone by but he was shocked when they walked into the room and he saw the man who shot him. He knew from his investigation that Fisher was only five years older than Neal but the man who sat glaring at them looked decades older. The prisoner stared at Neal with his eyes narrowing.

"What are you doing here?" he demanded, trying to stand.

"Sit" The guard ordered, as he pushed Fisher back down.

"Who are you?" Fisher turned his attention to Peter.

"I'm the one you shot" Peter answered evenly, "and the reason you will rot in jail for the rest of your life."

"Your fault" Fisher said. "You chose to save this piece of garbage" he added, staring at Neal. "Don't make me ask you again, why are you here?" he spit out. Peter glanced at Neal and the younger man seemed frozen in fear, his eyes wide as he stared back at the prisoner. Peter wanted to go to him, put his arm around his friend and take him away but one; he knew Neal needed answers to move on and two… Peter, as perverse as it seemed, was fascinated by Neal's reaction to this man.

In all the time he has known Neal, even when he was chasing him, the younger man had never feared anything. He carried himself with an arrogance that was bearable most days and annoying the rest of the time. But at the moment that Neal didn't exist and after several minutes of silent glares this Neal finally spoke.

"Glenn, why'd you try to kill me?" Peter was shocked at how young Neal sounded and he glanced at the prisoner to gage his reaction to Neal's question.

Glenn chuckled as he kicked one leg out, only as far as the shackles would allow. "Moron" he said. "You're a traitor; Working for the FBI and living in that fancy mansion. Of course I was going to kill you. I should have done it all those years ago before you snuck away."

Peter raised an eyebrow, clearly remembering Neal stating they were fine when he left. He glanced at Neal who was quietly staring at the prisoner, his mouth twitching ever so slightly.

"You wanted me to torture that dog for no reason" Neal whispered. "I had to let it go" he added.

"Sissy" Glenn barked. "And I was going to take my anger out on you but I found a rabbit and gutted it. And then you ran like a coward. Took me a long time but I finally found you…no one leaves without my ok." He laughed loudly. "Actually no one leaves at all."

Peter made a mental note to investigate that last statement with the cold case department. He wasn't sure if Neal heard what he needed but Peter had enough with this psycho and was about to say so when Neal spoke again, his voice louder and stronger.

"You're a fraud" He accused the prisoner. "You claimed you were like us, street kids with nowhere to go but you had a home and you had a family and your mom was giving you money to survive. You lied to us from day one when you said we were in this together." Neal paused as he bit lightly on his lowly lip. "You saved my life when you found me but you almost took away the best thing that has happened to me and I hope you get what you deserve in here."

"Liar" Glenn barked as he jumped up, towards Neal, only getting a foot away before the guard grabbed him. "I have no family and I will kill you the moment I get out of here." Neal backed away from the prisoner, bumping into Peter in the process.

"Take him away" Peter ordered as he put a protective arm around Neal's shoulders.

"You're dead" Glenn screamed as backup arrived and two guards hauled him away, though they could both still hear what he was yelling.

"Neal, he will die in prison…I promise." Peter walked around the younger man until he was facing Neal…actually a very pale imitation of his friend who looked at him blankly.

"Neal, are you ok?"

"No" Neal whispered as he leaned forward and hooked his chin over Peter's shoulder, shocking the agent in the process. Neal seemed suspended in mid air, barely touching Peter…waiting to see how the agent would react.

"It's ok" Peter whispered back, bracing himself as he wrapped his arms around Neal and the younger man leaned heavily against him.

"It's ok" Peter repeated as Neal let out a long, shuddering sigh and turned his head, resting it on Peter's shoulder.

Peter could feel Neal's rapidly beating heart and he felt the tug of his suit as Neal grabbed a hold of the fabric, clinging desperately to the agent.

Time stood still for the two men as Peter allowed Neal to calm down and to dictate what happened next.

"Peter?"

"Hhmm?"

"Can I use the room tonight?"  
Despite the situation Peter smiled. "Of course you can" he answered, as he embraced Neal tighter.

"Neal, are you ok?" Peter walked into the guest room where he found his friend sitting near the window staring out at the snow covered trees. Neal had barely touched his dinner claiming he was tired and excused himself to go to sleep. Yet three hours later, Peter found him still dressed and nowhere near the bed.

"Peter, want to see something?" He held his hand out and Peter took the picture. "Is this you and your mom?" Neal nodded as Peter stared at the picture…the little boy with bright blue eyes was smiling as was the young woman who held him on her lap.

"How young was your mom?" Peter asked his eyes still on the picture. He figured she couldn't have been more than fifteen when she had Neal.

"I don't know." Neal shrugged. "It's the only picture I took because I don't remember her like this. She always looked old to me, or maybe it just seemed that way." Peter didn't know what to say as Neal took back the picture so he remained silent.

"Neal, it's late. Do you think you can sleep?"

"No" Neal answered honestly. "Too wound up…I think I'll sit here for a while more."

"Do you want me to sit with you?"

"Peter, really I'm ok. You don't need to stay with me." Peter wasn't so sure but he was tired and he was only down the hall if Neal needed him.

"OK, come find me if you need me." With a last glance at Neal, Peter walked out.

Peter turned over groaning, waking his wife in the process.

"Peter, what is it?"

"I just heard Neal go downstairs" Peter answered, as he sat up and grabbed his robe.

"Do you think he's leaving?"

"Not if I can help it." Peter stood gingerly and quickly put his slippers on. "Stay here. I'll take care of Neal."

Downstairs Peter saw the kitchen light on and headed that way. Neal turned as he entered with a sheepish smile on his face.

"Sorry I woke you" he said as he found the jar of jelly in the refrigerator and quickly made himself two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. "Peter, you want anything?" The agent shook his head no as he watched Neal place the sandwiches on the table and grab a bottle of water. With a bemused look on his face Peter opened the cabinet and took out a bag of chips and placed it on the table near Neal. He watched Neal gobble the first sandwich in record time, pleased to see the young man get this appetite back.

"Neal, you haven't slept at all have you?"

"No" Neal replied with a mouth full of chips. "I've been thinking all night and now I'm starving."

"No kidding" Peter muttered as Neal devoured the second sandwich. "And when you're done eating?" Peter asked.

Neal looked at him strangely. "It's late, I'm going to sleep."

"Can I ask what happened to brighten your mood?"

Neal shrugged. "I've been thinking all night" he repeated, and much to Peter's chagrin he didn't elaborate.

"About?" Peter asked, prompting him.

Neal took a long swig of water and then placed the bottle to the side, and he glanced at Peter frowning slightly.

"Peter, I was just fifteen when I met Glenn. If it wasn't for him I wouldn't have survived and part of me knew he was violent and I let it go because I wasn't ready to be on my own. I ran when he asked me to kill animals for the fun of it and then he showed up here and it never occurred to me that he wanted me dead." Neal shrugged. "You almost died because of me but you didn't. I needed Glenn then and I need you now and you're not going anywhere."

"No, I'm not" Peter quietly agreed.

"I have a job" Neal continued, "I have a place to stay and I have a few good friends I can trust. I like where I am right now so I can't look back any longer. I need to move forward."

"You do" Peter agreed again, laughing when Neal rolled his eyes.

"Are you going to agree with everything I say?" Neal asked.

"As long as you make sense" Peter countered, taking a few chips from the bag.

"I want to go to work tomorrow" Neal said, "And I want to go back to June's."

"OK." Peter nodded, glancing at the wall clock, noticing it was nearly 2am. "Go to sleep and I don't want to hear a peep out of you until 9am, got it?"

Neal nodded as he quickly cleaned up his mess.

"Are you going to be able to sleep on a full stomach?" Peter asked as they climbed the stairs.

"Of course" Neal said nonchalantly.

"Wait to you hit forty" Peter muttered, staggering back to his room.

"Neal ok?" Elizabeth asked, half asleep.

"He's fine." Peter said as he snuggled close to his wife, falling asleep soon after.


	21. Chapter 21

Neal stood off to the side, intently watching the basketball game. He had twisted his ankle nearly five minutes into the game and though it wasn't as bad as he made it seem, if Peter saw through the ruse, he didn't call Neal on it. Neal had played, mostly because Peter had wanted him to but it was apparent from the beginning that Neal didn't have the killer instinct needed to compete with these guys on the floor.

"How's the ankle?" Neal smiled at Elizabeth.

"It's ok."

"He looks good, doesn't he?" Elizabeth asked with her eyes on her husband. Neal nodded. Most watching the game would never have known how close Peter came to dying. He still had a brace on his knee and Neal noticed a slight limp when he ran, but he kept up with the others, not bad considering some were almost half his age. Peter scored the go ahead basket and Elizabeth started yelling and clapping.

"Game's almost over" Elizabeth remarked, "Don't you want to go back in?"

Neal chuckled. "Peter wants to win this year. I can't compete with these guys."

"Neal, do you know why he wanted you to play?" Shrugging, Neal shook his head no.

"He wants you to feel part of the FBI, part of his team…."

"Elizabeth, I don't need this game to feel like I belong. After everything that has happened the past six months, I know I belong. I played because Peter wanted me to, but we never discussed how long I had to stay in."

The fans started yelling as the game was tied in the last minute. Both Elizabeth and Neal drew closer to the action. In the last few seconds Peter stole the inbounds pass and tossed it to Jones who easier made the layup. Buzzer went off signaling the end and even Neal was clapping, caught up in the excitement of the ending.

"Great game" Elizabeth yelled as she hugged her sweat soaked husband.

"How's the ankle?" Peter asked, slapping Neal on the back.

"It's ok."

"Good. Let's get cleaned up and we're going out to celebrate with the guys."

"We are?" Neal asked cautiously, wondering why Peter didn't mention this beforehand.

"Yes, weare" Peter emphasized with his hand on Neal's shoulder. "Your job application came back today, officially approved and we are going to celebrate."

"Neal that's great." Elizabeth reached up and gently kissed his cheek. Neal still wasn't sure how he felt about this but he was happy the job would be waiting, if he chose to accept it.

"I'll be back in a few minutes" Peter said as he walked away, beckoned by one of the players on the NYPD side.

"Neal do me a favor." Elizabeth pulled the young man away from the crowd. "Stay sober tonight and make sure Peter gets home safe." Before Neal could question her, he heard Peter calling his name and he followed the agent to the locker room to get ready.

* * *

Elizabeth was at the door waiting when it opened and Neal helped Peter into the house. The young man looked confused and shocked and Elizabeth understood completely. She wished she had explained to Neal how Peter got with this group as they mourned their comrades who died. Peter was blabbering something incoherent as Neal helped him off with his jacket.

"Help me get him upstairs" Elizabeth quietly said as she steadied her husband between them. Once they were upstairs and Peter was safely seated on the bed, Elizabeth ushered Neal out of the bedroom.

"Elizabeth…"

"He'll be fine in the morning" Elizabeth quietly said as she walked Neal towards his room. "Peter will probably sleep until mid afternoon so if you'd like I have a new recipe you can help me with."

Neal seemed lost as he kept glancing towards the master bedroom and he was sure he heard Peter crying.

"Neal, this happens every time and I promise you, he'll be fine and he won't remember this in the morning. So get some rest and don't worry about him." Elizabeth reached up and quickly kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you for a being a good friend." Elizabeth eyed the dog who stood in the hallway, unsure of where he belonged.

"Satch, stay with Neal tonight." Neal called the dog who quickly trotted over and followed him into the bedroom.

Neal changed and then realized that he needed to use the bathroom which of course was right next to the master bedroom. He tried not to listen but Peter was loud and he clearly heard him crying and Elizabeth's voice trying to soothe him. Back in his own bedroom, Neal covered himself with the blankets and buried his face in the pillow. The dog settled next to him.

"Satch, he'll be fine tomorrow" Neal whispered as he scratched the dog's head. Once Peter quieted down and mostly likely passed out, sleep came rather easily for Neal.

* * *

Elizabeth was up early and fixing herself a quick breakfast when Neal walked in, still looking shell shocked from the night before.

"Morning Neal" she cheerfully said, as he sat down at the table across from her.

"What the heck happened last night?" Neal asked, as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

"You tell me" Elizabeth countered evenly, "I wasn't there, you were."

Neal shrugged. "It started out ok with us boasting about the win and they took it good naturedly but the later it got and the more they drank, the more morose the mood turned. Some had the sense to leave but Peter wouldn't go and David finally told me to get him out of there before he wasn't able to walk." Neal shook his head. "As it was, I practically had to drag him home and I almost called a cab."

Elizabeth smiled wearily. "I must be the only one who hates the game because I know they'll go out drinking afterwards and I know how Peter is. He keeps everything inside and it all seems to come out at once and it's so hard to see him like that."

"Who's Steve?" Neal asked, remembering a name Peter spoke often.

"Peter grew up with him and they were going to be NYPD together until Peter chose the FBI." Elizabeth paused but Neal already knew the rest. "He died that day, didn't he?"

Elizabeth nodded. "Neal you came into our lives at the perfect time, even though your name monopolized way too many dinner conversations" she added, with no hint of regret. "Peter healed while chasing you and neither of us could have imagined you'd be part of our lives in this manner."

"And Peter won't remember last night?"

Elizabeth shrugged. "He doesn't act like he does or maybe he's just trying to protect me. Neal, I know from experience, he'll be fine and back to himself today. I'm glad you were there for him…Peter doesn't let many see him that way…"

"I owe him so it's the least I could do." Neal grinned brightly as he poured a bowl of cereal for himself.

* * *

"That smells good" Neal said as Elizabeth took the chicken dish from the oven. "I'll pack some up so you can take it home" Elizabeth offered.

"Something smells good" Peter said as he entered the kitchen.

"Morning sleepyhead" Elizabeth neared her husband for a quick kiss. "Just eat some toast for now. If your stomach is ok, we'll have this for dinner." He nodded, eyeing Neal. "Morning Neal."

"Afternoon is more like it" Neal retorted, smiling at his partner. "Do you think you can drive me home? Mozzie called and needs to see me."

Peter's eye narrowed. "Anything I need to know about?" Neal held his hands up innocently, inwardly pleased that Peter sounded like himself.

"Peter, if it's anything bad, I promise you'll be the first to know. Scout's honor."

"You were never a boy scout" Peter retorted, "but I believe you. Go get your stuff together, I want to get home before the snow starts again."

The ride was quite for both men until Peter pulled over to the curb in front of June's house.

"Neal, wait." Peter said when Neal had one foot out the door. The ex con turned with his eyes on his partner.

"Thank you" Peter quietly said. "For last night and for being you and coming into my life when I needed a big distraction."

Neal was silent, unsure how to respond to Peter, to someone who meant more to him than Neal could ever express properly. But Peter already knew that and he quickly took care of the tense moment.

"Now get out and don't be late tomorrow. Understand?"

Neal smiled. "See you tomorrow. If you arrive early, June has this new coffee that you have to try." As Neal got closer to the house, he spied something in the shadows.

"Mozzie, you can come out, Peter left." The little man wandered out of the shadows and followed Neal into the house.

"That smells good. Bet it will go good with some wine." Mozzie remarked as they entered Neal's apartment. Neal took the hint and quickly warmed up some chicken in the microwave while Mozzie found the perfect bottle.

"I saw you play last night" Mozzie said when they were seated at the table.

"You were at the game?" Neal couldn't keep the surprise out of his voice. "Why didn't you say hi?"

"Too many good guys" Mozzie retorted. "Had to keep my distance" he added.

"Mozzie, get use to them, they're part of my life now and mostly good people."

"What about me?" Mozzie asked. "Am I still a part of your life?"

Neal chuckled softly. "Moz, you're my best friend, you better not go anywhere." Neal picked up his glass.

"Here's to new beginnings" he toasted.

"And old friends" Mozzie countered.

"I'll drink to that" Neal said and he did.


End file.
